Show Prep 66

Greetings and Salutations, people. It’s the radio show that focuses on quality like the Cincinnati Bengals focus on character, THIS is Vertically Striped Radio. I am your host Craig Dodge


Today on VSR – Mr. T and Billy Mays square off if one of our most intense Duel’s ever with a last minute contender also jumping in to make it a three way duel…Not sure if you still call that a duel, but we’ll allow it today, Football season is quickly approaching, so today will be our Vertically Striped Preseason Football Spectacular!, We may have a little bit of Dr. Seuss influence in today’s show, all that plus the news of course, and a music recommendation.

Give out the phone number - (646) 716-6831 OR 6-HOP-1-MOVE-1

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com


Pale Green Pants with nobody inside them.


Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)


POMPANO BEACH, Fla. (AP) -- A cell phone store manager in South Florida dissuaded an armed man from robbing the store by telling him Jesus wouldn't approve. Instead of panicking when the suspect pulled a weapon, Nayara Goncalves started talking with him. He was jobless, and the 20-year-old Christian offered to connect him with friends who could help him find work.

She said she believed the man when he said he attended church and wasn't a bad person. She told him the answer to his financial problems wasn't in the cash register.

Then, the clerk nudged him with a little sin of her own. She said the store would hold her responsible for any cash he stole.

Goncalves said, "I just wanted to remind him that he knew better."








WISCONSIN – I have found the destination for Dave Dameshek’s summer vacation, well, for him or anyone else who just plain loves mustard. The destination? It’s Wisconsin, of course, where there is a museum devoted to the simple spread.

Barry Levenson, curator and CMO — "chief mustard officer" — of the National Mustard Museum, says a fit of despair led him to create the museum in 1986.

"My beloved Boston Red Sox lost the World Series," he says. "Decided I need a hobby to get over my depression. That's the morning I began collecting jars of mustard."

And Levenson, a lawyer by trade, quickly saw his hobby turn into an obsession.

"I argued a case at the U.S. Supreme Court," he says. "On my way to the court, I saw this little jar of mustard on a discarded room-service tray. I didn't have time to go back to my room. So I brought it with me and argued in front of the Supreme Court with a jar of mustard in my pocket." He won that case, by the way.

Now Levenson dedicates his time to collecting condiments professionally. His collection has grown to more than 5,000 mustards from around the globe — everything from French stone-ground to French's Classic Yellow.

They're all on display at the National Mustard Museum, in Middleton, Wis., which is gearing up to celebrate National Mustard Day, on Aug. 7 — a Saturday, for anyone considering a cookout.

But that's not all: The museum also doubles as an institute of higher learning.

"It is the hallowed campus of the Mustard College," Levenson says, "which everyone knows as Poupon U."

And while you can't take any classes for academic credit at Poupon U — they do have a nifty fight song: (Clip 60)

On our hot dogs, on our bratwurst, mustard is so cool.

Never mayo, never ketchup; they're against the rules.

Gleaming gold and mellow yellow; smooth, rough, sweet and hot,

Fight, POUPON U! We'll fight and eat some lunch.


SYDNEY, Australia (Reuters) – Are you a nerd on vacation in Australia and worried that touring a local cave won’t live up to your nerdly expectations? Staff at the Jenolan Caves west of Sydney have added a new out-of-this-world attraction that should assuage any geek fears that you may be harboring – For you can now tour the Jenolan Caves in the Star Trek language Klingon.

Currently a self-guided audio tour at the caves in the Blue Mountains is offered in eight languages, but staff came up with the idea of adding the fictional language Klingon as the caves were once featured in the popular TV series.

"Jenolan Caves was apparently immortalized in the Star Trek - Next Generation episode 'Relics' as the writers named on of their Starships - the USS Jenolan," the Jenolan Caves Reserve Trust said in a statement.

"Now, this relationship will be developed further, when Jenolan Caves adds the language of Star Trek's great warrior race to a tour of their most popular cave."

The Jenolan cave system, located just over 100 miles west of Sydney, is enormous with over 25 miles of passages.

The Klingon tour has been set up for the Nettle Cave, which attracts up to 200,000 visitors a year, and for those of you uber-nerds looking to make plans, the Klingon tour will start being offered on August 22.

Jenolan Caves had Klingon language experts Michael Roney Jr and Tracy Canfield fly in earlier this month from the United States to record the audio tour.

"We wanted to do something a bit obscure and we will now be the first tourist attraction on this planet at least to have a Klingon tour," cave guide Gordon Mills, a self-described Star Trek enthusiast, told Reuters.

"There is a fantasy side to caves and a timeless nature, rather like Star Trek, so we thought this was fitting."

I don’t know if it’s fitting or not, but for the millions and millions of spelunking Trekkies in the world…this must truly be a dream come true.

I’m Craig, and that’s the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)


Bring on the boys…


The Duel – Auto tune competition. Billy Mays, Mr. T, or Double rainbow guy?


NFL Preseason Spectacular!

Most interesting team:
Cincinnati Bengals:
Listen to who is now on this team – Terrell Owens, Chad Ochocinco, Cedric Benson, Tank Johnson, Pacman Jones, and Matt Jones.

Biggest Question Mark:
Tim Tebow:
He’s selling a lot of jerseys, but will he surprise us? Will he even get a chance to play this year? Will he get Josh McDaniels fired? Will he do anything to merit the number of jerseys he is currently selling? Will he make me cry this season?

Team with high expectations that I’m guessing will disappoint:
The New York Jets
San Diego Chargers
Minnesota Vikings

Teams with low expectations that I’m guessing will surprise:
Detroit Lions
Oakland Raiders
Pittsburgh Steelers

Player who will look the weirdest in his new team’s uniform:
Brandon Marshall – Dolphins
Jason Campbell - Raiders
Terrell Owens – Bengals
Donovan McNabb – Redskins

Under the Radar players that may emerge:
Kevin Kolb – Eagles
Matthew Stafford - Lions

Out of nowhere team to make the playoffs:
Atlanta Falcons

Preseason guess for worst team in the league:
St. Louis Rams

Preseason guess for best team in the league:
Baltimore Ravens

Now, the division winners: (No one knows what they are talking about)
Roll Dice


NFC:
East – (Cowboys, Redskins, Eagles, Giants) – Face: Cowboys Dice: Giants
North – (Packers, Bears, Lions, Vikings) – Face: Packers Dice: Bears
South – (Saints, Buccaneers, Panthers, Falcons) Face: Falcons Dice: Falcons
West – (49ers, Rams, Seahawks, Cardinals) Face: 49ers Dice: Cardinals

AFC:
East – (Dolphins, Patriots, Bills, Jets) Face: Patriots Dice: Jets
North – (Bengals, Steelers, Browns, Ravens) Face: Ravens Dice: Steelers
South – (Texans, Colts, Jaguars, Titans) Face: Colts Dice: Colts
West – (Broncos, Raiders, Chiefs, Chargers) Face: Chargers Dice: Chargers



Shek Republic in a Week:
1. How were you introduced to Dave Dameshek?
2. What is your take on mustard?
3. Who is the most beautiful woman in the world?
4. Who is your hero and why?
5. What's the most interesting thing you could wish for?




Week in Wankery:

Yellow Card:
-Title Closer who required that our appraisal read Pike’s instead of Pikes
-Wendy’s worker who gave my buddy and I forks for our Frosty’s on Wednesday night
-The Colorado Rockies – Post all-star break


Man of the Match:


Red Card:
My immune system – Sick last weekend, Cold all week, Sick again this weekend

What was I afraid of? - Pale Green Pants with Nobody inside them: (Clip 56)



Deaths:
Puritans – Not so nice to the dead all the time. (Talk about the burial ground)

Who’s death would cause the biggest world wide sadness?



Pooping in public: No shame, or hide your feet? (Clip 81 – MM’s rap)



The Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:
(Clip 60) – Bright Eyes – “Road to Joy” from the Album “I’m Wide Awake, It’s morning”

Thanks to: (Whoever called)


Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Top 7 Bad Euphamisms:

-Friendly Fire
-Flight Attendant
-To Pass Away
-Putting a dog to sleep
-Gentleman’s Club
-For Mature Audiences
-Big Boned
-Full Figured
-In a Family Way
-Laid Off