Greetings and Salutations, people! Well, 113 Episodes of this show haven’t killed me…let’s see if it’s 114 that does the trick. It’s the most dangerous show on Fake Radio, THIS is Vertically Striped Radio. The Surgeon General recommends you consult a doctor before listening, but you’re just going to be stubborn and listen anyway, aren’t you? My name is Craig Dodge, the Artful Dodger at your service…It’s 3:30 on a lovely Saturday in the Mountain Pine Cone which means VSR is once again ready to roll.
Tweet of the Week:
3rdTriumvirate The3rdTriumvirate
I'd hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I would love to be a crime fighting BEAR OF BAD NEWS!!!!
Today on VSR – The winds of change were blowing through sports, we’ll talk about some of the changes that took place. We’ve got another edition of “Something to Think About”. We’ll ticket a few wankers, I’ve got a double dose of news if we need it, and I have a new segment to debut with some incredible voice actors…
If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-6831 OR 6-HOP-1-MOVE-1
(Bring on Face)
Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
FLORENCE, Ky. – The zombie menace has once again found its way onto a highway sign.
After pranksters switched the message on an electronic road sign, motorists in northern Kentucky were warned this week to watch for zombies along the Interstate 71-75 corridor.
The usual message about upcoming roadwork was changed to: "Nightly lane closures, zombies ahead."
Kentucky Transportation Cabinet spokeswoman Nancy Wood said the Transportation Cabinet learned about the new message midmorning Thursday and turned it off until it can be fixed. Wood said officials are not amused by the prank.
BOULDER, Colo. – Police in Colorado have arrested a 30-year-old man accused of hiding in the tank of a portable toilet at a yoga festival last week.
Kim Kobel of the Boulder police department says Luke Chrisco was arrested during an unrelated panhandling investigation Thursday. Police say an officer noticed his resemblance to the toilet suspect, and Chrisco was taken into custody after he was interviewed by a Boulder detective.
Police believe he was the man discovered in the toilet at the yoga festival in Boulder by a woman who lifted the lid. A man who checked said he saw someone covered in a tarp inside.
A festival security officer says he chased a man who eventually emerged, but the suspect slipped away. The man was covered in human waste.
Chrisco faces misdemeanor charges of unlawful sexual contact and criminal invasion of privacy.
BUFFALO, N.Y. – State police say a man's effort to ditch some drugs from a moving car in western New York didn't exactly go as planned.
Troopers with the state police say 20-year-old Sean Schmidt was standing with his upper body sticking out the sunroof of a vehicle traveling on Interstate 190 in Buffalo late Monday night.
When a trooper following in a state police cruiser activated the car lights to pull the vehicle over, Schmidt tossed a small bag of marijuana out the window to avoid a potential possession charge. Unfortunately for Schmidt, it landed on the hood of the trooper's car.
Troopers say Schmidt was ticketed for marijuana possession and not wearing a seatbelt.
I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
The Winds of Change: (Clip 19)
Big time sports changes this week: Bills, Predators, and (Hooray) Winnipeg Jets Ron Artest is changing his name to Metta World Peace (Ron Artest has officially lost his mind.)
The text-to-speech players:
A Few Good Men (Clip 42)
Monty Python and the Holy Grail (Clip 43)
The Empire Strikes Back (Clip 44)
Bull Durham (Clip 45)
Jack White 6th Anniversary/Divorce Party:
I’ve heard of amicable divorces, but this is taking it to a whole new level.
One Day after Mike Dell did Part II of the LCS White Stripes Tribute, Jack White pulled this…
Karen Elson and Jack White kindly request the presence of GUEST at a party to celebrate their 6th Anniversary, and their upcoming divorce with a positive swing bang hum dinger. The Party will include dancing, photos, memories, and drinks with alcohol in them. This is only for close personal friends and family so please no plus ones or dead beats. Please help us celebrate together this anniversary of the making and breaking of the sacred union of marriage with our best friends and animals.
Something to Think About!
1. I want whoever does PR for ladybugs to talk me up. That is good marketing right there.
2. Whoever invented the box for Uno cards needs to be scolded.
3. Enough with Octopuses predicting things. (Paula the Octopus – Women’s World Cup.)
4. I am a sports sexist
5. In-N-Out may be expanding! Allegedly they are opening a new regional office in Dallas
6. I have a new addiction: Lego Mini-Figurines – Like baseball cards
7. Who is your spirit Muppet?
Mike Dell and Larry Fairish – Stadler and Waldorf
Craig Dodge – Either Kermit the Frog or Fozzie Bear
Face – Rowlf the Dog
The Ed – The Swedish Chef
The Ryan – Lew Zeland (The guy who throws the boomerang fish)
Amiezin – Sam the Eagle
4th and 26 – Scooter
Jim Iovino – Zoot
99% Invisible – Sounds of the Art (Clip 38)
The Week in Wankery
Tarbells closing
Whole Foods – Compost, Trash, and Recycle bins. Garbage should not be a multiple choice quiz.
Work Air Conditioning – Welcome to Ice Station Zebra
Amazon.com customers
Mystery Neighbor who wrote a letter about our dogs
Sharp Dressed Man (Intro-Clip 19) - (The Whale’s Voicemail) (Clip 46)
Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)
"Hey ... well calling ... a long drive here the festival rockville maryland and I'm looking at a stick your old man riding a John gear riding on where I live here in the background ... he's wearing our insured short cad vendor roddie this riding up on our it's going about the C. V. S. ... Rina at dr Steven hoping that would walk sorry also is coming up so and a blue Cap hey he's ... really Cut the that's a pretty ... Gap or Clark here ... having the store it's about the size of to basketball courts next to each other it's pretty good size and I'll tell you about it got it ... call back 90 degrees outside not"
MORE NEWS!!!
Clip 39 – BS News Report
Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)
Twitter: @socnorb777
Remember – Next week we will be discussing “The Parking Lot Movie”
Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:
Hellogoodbye – Would it kill you? (Clip 90)
Shalom and Good Evening to you all!
(Clip 98 – Info Outro)
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