Greetings and Salutations, people! Welcome to the first ever “explicit” rated show in the history of VSR. I am your host Craig Dodge, and this is an emotional day here in the VSR radio dojo. It’s our Feelings episode. You’ll see what I mean when I say that soon enough…but first, let’s get on with the normal proceedings.
Tweet of the Week:
3rdTriumvirate The3rdTriumvirate
If i had to be stuck on a desert island with three people. I'd probably choose two homosexual shipbuilders and Scarlett Johansson.
Today on VSR – As stated before, this is the “Feelings” episode, and items on the agenda include: My exclusive interview with Fourth and 26 and his girlfriend, nay, FIANCEE. The most explicit thing I have ever played on the fake radio airwaves…but which I wanted to include because it was the best example for “anger” that also still made me laugh. And the show will finish up with quite possibly the saddest story I have ever heard.
Before all that, a salute to my beautiful bride, we celebrated 11 years together last night with a dinner at a place called Mataam Fez, a Moroccan restaurant in Denver. Quite the experience. Sitting on pillows, table that was 18 inches off the ground, no silverware, blankets draped from the ceiling and fancy rugs EVERYWHERE. Felt like you were a Persian king eating in an old time tent from the Biblical times. They spritzed rosewater on you at the end and poored a pitcher of water over your hands to clean them when you first arrive. At the very beginning of the meal they give you a towel to place over your left shoulder. It’s a weird, but fun dining experience.
Give out the phone number - (646) 716-6831 OR 6-HOP-1-MOVE-1
I’m going to try something new, because I think it’d be good to get Face’s input on the news…especially one story today.
(Bring on Face)
Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
WELLINGTON (AFP) – New Zealand prisoners are reportedly being offered carrot sticks to help them overcome nicotine cravings as jails prepare to go smoke-free next month.
A leaked internal memo from Invercargill Prison said prisoners were being supplied with two carrot sticks a day in an effort to make them quit smoking before the total ban comes into force on July 1, the Southland Times reported.
The memo said one jumbo-sized carrot could yield 16 carrot sticks if cut into uniform size "to the best of our ability", the newspaper reported on Tuesday.
Corrections Association of New Zealand president Beven Hanlon said when he first heard about the scheme he thought it was a joke.
"I don't think it is one of the best ideas but it is worth a try," he told the newspaper.
Hanlon, whose union represents prison wardens, said the carrot sticks were intended to take prisoners' minds off smoking and they were a healthier alternative to other options, such as hard-boiled sweets.
"It's the whole oral thing... if they have got something in their mouth, they won't be looking for a cigarette to put in it," he said.
KANSAS CITY, Mo (Reuters Life!) – Police in a suburb in the state of Missouri recently encountered one tough alligator -- or so they thought.
Officers in Independence, a Kansas City suburb, responded to a call on a Saturday evening about a large alligator lurking on the embankment of a pond, police spokesman Tom Gentry said Thursday.
An officer called a state conservation agent, who advised him to shoot the alligator because there was little that conservation officials could do at that time, Gentry said.
As instructed an officer shot the alligator, not once but twice, but both times the bullets bounced off -- because the alligator was made of cement.
The property owner told police later that he placed the ornamental gator by the pond to keep children away. But residents had little to fear.
"There are no alligators around here, we are too far north, it's too cold," said Bill Graham, spokesman for the Missouri Department of Conservation.
Gentry acknowledged the incident is drawing a lot of attention.
"In hindsight, it's humorous," he said. "But we have to take every call seriously."
You never know what you might find in New Mexico. If you smell something terrible, it could LITERALLY be just about anything.
ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. – New Mexico authorities are making a stink after an odor wafting from a New Mexico property lead them to a foul discovery — dozens of dead animals, including the remains of a rhino named Sally.
Authorities plan to cite, Ruben Saavedra, (Suh-Ved-Dra)
with illegally stockpiling animal carcasses after finding two dozen sheep, three horses, and the rhinoceros on the Albuquerque property.
Ruben, who operates an animal disposal service, said Thursday that personal problems caused him to get behind on his work.
"So I know I did wrong, but we're remedying the problem," he said.
Ruben says he took the carcasses to an animal interment site — where Sally, a 44-year-old zoo rhino euthanized in December, was laid to rest — and that authorities watched.
Saavedra faces a fine and jail time.
So if you live in New Mexico, and you smell a terrible smell…it could quite possibly a decomposing rhinoceros.
I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Bring on The Whale:
Happiness: (Clip 37 – Josh and Holly)
Fear: (Clip 38 – Story about the woman hiking in the Colorado mountains and gets a photo of herself sleeping)
Boredom: Face and the 30 team fantasy league
Embarrassment: (Clip 39)
Anger: (Perhaps Disgust or Stupidity) (Clip 40 – Spurrier/Georgia Fan)
Anger: (Clip 41) – Insubordinate – “Die” (Word of warning about the content.)
Sharp Dressed Man (woman)
(Clip 19)
Light pink stretchy too tight shirt which was working it’s hardest to cover over far too much woman with blubbery bits bubbling out from the bottom and spilling over the top of tight white cloth shorts that were much too short. The pink Crocs were a nice touch. She was leading a large fluffy dog that looked like a cross between a cotton ball, a Labrador and a stick of butter. The piece de resistance was the cigarette that she was sucking on like a lollipop as she held the leash with two hands and tried to issue commands to her dog with her mouth closed as she was dragged down the street by her bloated cotton puff of a dog.
Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE
Twitter: @socnorb777
Programming note: No show next Saturday. I’m taking the wife for a weekend away with just the two of us.
Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:
The Gaslight Anthem – Film Noir (Clip 95)
Sadness: (Clip 42)
Shalom and Good Evening to you all!
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