Greetings
and Salutations, People: I’m Craig Dodge and my mother just gave me a coconut.
VSR is
brought to you by the Amazon.com link on VerticallyStripedSocks.com.
Tweet of the Week:
@JermHimselfish
Just once, I'd like to open up my refrigerator and find cartoon versions of my favorite foods arguing over which one of them is healthier.
Just once, I'd like to open up my refrigerator and find cartoon versions of my favorite foods arguing over which one of them is healthier.
Things I
liked this week:
Minor League
Hockey
The fact that
The Walking Dead returned from its mid-season break. (Although, the actual show
wasn’t all that great.)
Driving past
the Blue Demon Horse Statue out at DIA a few times. (Apparently it’s been 5
years, so people are petitioning for it to come down.)
Today on VSR –
It’s the Valentine’s Show, so I have a Valentine story from The Truth along
with my favorite song I could think of that included the word Valentine…other
than that, I pretty much despise Valentine’s Day, so we’re trying to keep it to
a dull roar. Although, we’ll take a look at which holidays Americans spend the
most money. We’ll the Magnificent Seven: Top Seven Things ALMOST everyone likes,
and a brand new segment debuts today.
If you’d like
to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB
(Bring on
Face) –
Let’s get to
the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Let’s get to
the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Pont-de-Metz, FRANCE - A French driver was forced to
drive at 125mph for more than 150 miles after his accelerator jammed during a
supermarket trip.
Frank Lecerf called police when his modified Renault
Laguna malfunctioned in Pont-de-Metz, near Amiens, in northern France.
The car's speed first jammed at 60mph, and then it
accelerated instead of slowing down each time he tried to brake.
"My life flashed before me," he told Le
Courrier picard. "I just wanted it to stop."
The 36-year-old managed to call the emergency services to
report the problem as he hurtled along the French motorway past Calais and
Dunkirk, and across the Belgian border.
In scenes reminiscent of the movie 'Speed', police cars
were sent to safely escort the disabled motorist past other vehicles.
At the same time toll stations were ordered to raise
their barriers and let the cars through
Emergency services also put the driver through to a
Renault engineer, who vainly attempted to help him stop the car.
The car finally ran out of fuel after speeding across the
border and careered into a ditch in Alveringem.
Mr Lecerf was said to be unhurt but reportedly suffered
two epileptic seizures.
He claims to have suffered problems with his acceleration
getting stuck before.
His lawyer said he would file a legal complaint against
Renault over "endangerment of a person's life".
Great Falls, MONTANA – A Montana TV station's regular
programming was interrupted this week…by news of the zombie apocalypse.
KRTV of Montana has confirmed that hackers broke into their
Emergency Alert System on Monday.
The hackers broadcast that "dead bodies are rising
from their graves" in several Montana counties.
"This message did not originate from KRTV, and there
is no emergency," the channel announced via its website.
The alert claimed the bodies were "attacking the
living" and warned people not to "approach or apprehend these bodies
as they are extremely dangerous".
The Great Falls Tribune reported that the hoax alert did
not generate any calls to the police.
Los Angeles, CALIFORNIA - A boy and a girl have had
several fingers torn off during a game of tug-of-war at their high school in
Southern California.
The two South El Monte High School students were rushed
to Los Angeles County-USC Medical Center, where doctors were preparing to
reattach the digits.
"They are both stable and the parents were by their
bedside," hospital spokeswoman Rosa Sacca told the San Gabriel Valley
Tribune.
"They were getting ready to be taken to the
operating room to try to reattach the fingers."
School officials declined to identify the students, but it
has been reported that the girl was on the school's soccer team and the boy was
a football player.
The teenagers were participating in a lunchtime activity
celebrating homecoming with current and former students on Monday.
Authorities did not say how many fingers were lost or
explain how the tug-of-war caused the injuries.
OSLO (Reuters) - Norwegian public television plans to
broadcast a burning fireplace for 12 straight hours from Friday evening, with
firewood specialists providing color commentary, expert advice and a bit of
cultural tutoring.
"We'll talk about the very nerdy subjects like
burning, slicing and stacking the wood, but we'll also have cultural segments
with music and poems," Rune Moeklebust, a producer for state broadcaster
NRK.
"It will be very slow but noble television."
Moeklebust got the idea for the show from the wild
success of a firewood book by Lars Mytting, Norway's biggest firewood
celebrity. His book "Hel Ved", which means Strong Character in
English, is a play on words because ved also means "firewood".
Mytting, a guest on tonight's broadcast, has sold close
to 130,000 copies of the book since last year, a huge number in a country of 5
million people, with his publisher claiming that only "Fifty Shades of
Grey" sold more copies during the recent holiday season.
NRK is not new to quirky programming.
In 2011, it broadcast 134 hours non-stop of a cruise ship
going up the Norwegian coast to the Arctic, bagging the world record for the
longest continuous TV program along the way.
At one point 600,000 people tuned in to watch that
program with 3.2 million people, or over 60 percent of the population, glued to
the screen at one point.
And an earlier broadcast of an eight hour train journey
from Oslo to Bergen was so popular, NRK had to repeat it.
"People in Norway have a spiritual relationship with
fire," Moeklebust said. "Fire is the reason we're here, if there was
no firewood, we couldn't live in Norway, we'd freeze."
How will the fireplace do in the ratings?
"More people will tune in than on a normal Friday
night," Moeklebust said.
I’m Craig,
and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
I’m Craig,
and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Bring on the Whale
Band name of the week:
Noble
Norweigian Television
Top 7
Holidays for American Spending: (Source IBISWorld)
7. Halloween
– 6 Billion Dollars (Roughly 50-60 Bucks per American that celebrates the
holiday.)
6. Father’s
Day – 10 Billion
5. Easter –
14 Billion
(On Eggs,
Food, Candy, and the biggest Easter expenditure: New Clothes)
4. Mother’s Day
– 15 Billion
3.
Valentine’s Day – 18 Billion
2.
Thanksgiving – 31 Billion
1. Christmas
– 135 Billion
Eat Cake –
The Truth – Clip 79
Face vs the News: (Clip 15)
-Pope
retiring
-Carnival
Cruise Ship
-Chris Dorner
– Psycho ex-cop who killed other cops
-Meteor hits
Russia
Magnificent Seven: (Clip 07)
Top Seven Things ALMOST everyone
likes:
Honorable
Mentions:
Bacon
Playing Ping
Pong
7. The movie
Groundhog Day
6. Scratching
a dog and making its leg twitch
5. Jennifer
Lawrence
4. Smelling Coffee
3. Pizza
2. Super Bowl
1. Playing
Super Mario Bros.
Voice Mail –
720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)
Twitter:
@socnorb777
Vertically Striped Music
Recommendation:
The Beatles –
When I’m Sixty-Four
Shalom and Good Evening to you all!
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