Greetings and Salutations, people! It’s the radio show that takes days off in the same manner that the Ed retires, this is VSR. I am your host…
VSR and Fake Radio are brought to you by Amazon.com. (Clip 97)
Tweet of the Week:
imaudihere Rob
Nobody ever asks about my interests or how my day went. It's always, "Tell us the story of how that alligator ate most of your torso again."
Today on VSR – An abbreviated show today, I’ve got the long promised dumb lawsuit roundup, It’s the end of the world as we know it, of course, and naturally I feel fine…I’ve got a great bit of audio regarding the end of the world and a Karaoke performance which may be a sign of the end of the world, I’ve got a little bit of news, and proof of what happens when I try to record a show open while I’m driving…Which was somewhat rambling, which is why I started over, of course, and naturally I’ve got a music recommendation.
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Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
COLUMBUS, Ohio – Ohio Gov. John Kasich (KAY'-sik) isn't tickled by the pinkish color of the state's newer driver's licenses.
The governor said as an aside during a Tuesday speech in Dayton that he would eliminate what he called "the pink driver's license." The Columbus Dispatch reports his comment drew laughter.
Afterward, Kasich told reporters his remark was "sort of tongue in cheek," though he indicated others have complained about the color. He said he recently got his new license and went: "Whoa."
The American Association of Motor Vehicle Administrators says about 20 states have adopted the color. Ohio started phasing in the salmon color in 2009. Joe Andrews of the Department of Public Safety says it's a tough color to reproduce on a phony license.
LINCOLN, Neb. – Police in Nebraska say they've nabbed a pair of suspected grease thieves, thanks in part to the smell of old french fries.
Christy Harris, of Everton, Mo., and Jesse Moore, of Springfield, Mo., are charged with larceny. They're suspected of siphoning used cooking oil from a bin outside a Lincoln restaurant. Police think they may be involved in several other grease thefts.
Some businesses buy used grease for biodiesel fuel.
Harris and Moore were arrested early Wednesday after police stopped a pickup truck hauling a big tank. Officers say the tank smelled like "old, stale french fries." Police say the truck also had no rear license tag.
Harris and Moore were taken to the Lancaster County jail, and later released. Officials had no information on whether they had an attorney.
WASHINGTON (AFP) – When judgment day comes -- which some US Christian fundamentalists insist will happen on Saturday -- have you thought about what you're going to do with the family dog and cat?
In 26 US states, you could have them rescued and adopted by enterprising atheists who have set up a business to care for the animal companions of any Christians who are selected to go to heaven when Jesus Christ comes back.
"You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved. But when the Rapture comes, what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind?" Eternal Earth-Bound Pets says on its website, offering to "take that burden off your mind."
The post-doomsday pet rescue service already has 259 clients, who have paid $135 for the first pet and $20 for each additional pet at the same address, to ensure the faithful animal companions are looked after and loved even when their Christian owners have gone to the other side.
All the rescuers are sworn atheists, which means they will definitely be left behind on Earth, ready to rescue pets after the Rapture, which one US Christian fundamentalist group has penciled for Saturday.
When judgment day happens, Eternal Earth-Bound Pets co-founder Bart Centre "will notify all of our rescuers to go into action and they will drive to the homes of anyone who's signed a contract with us, pick up their pets and take them home and adopt them as their own, keeping them happy and healthy for the rest of their lives.
"This will happen only if and when the Rapture happens. So we do not expect to have to do anything on Saturday," Centre told AFP.
Contracts are good for 10 years, just in case the Mayan calendar prophesy, which predicts the world will end in December next year, comes true.
I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Bring on Face and The Whale:
Dumb Lawsuit Roundup:
A Manhattan mom is suing a pricey preschool for dumping her "very smart" 4-year-old with tykes half her age and boring her with lessons about shapes and colors.
In court papers, Nicole Imprescia suggests York Avenue Preschool jeopardized little Lucia's chances of getting into an elite private school or, one day, the Ivy League.
She's demanding a refund of the $19,000 tuition and class-action status for other toddlers who weren't properly prepped for the standardized test that can mean the difference between Dalton and - gasp! - public school.
A Wheeling, Illinois woman claiming her new Adidas shoes were made of materials that stuck together, causing her to fall, filed a lawsuit Tuesday against the shoe company.
Anna Bourtseva claims she was injured during a June 12, 2010, fall because her new Adidas Midiru shoes stuck together, according to a suit filed in Cook County Circuit Court.
Bourtseva claims she purchased the shoes June 6, 2010, from an Adidas Outlet Store not knowing the shoe’s materials would cause them to stick together. The suit claims she fell forward and suffered serious internal and external injuries, including bruises, contusions and lacerations.
Bourtseva claims Adidas North America Inc. manufactured, assembled, constructed and designed shoes made of materials that had a tendency to stick together when they came into contact with each other. She also claims the shoes posed a tripping hazard that Adidas failed to warn her about.
The two-count suit seeks more than $50,000 plus the cost of the suit.
An Indiana woman is suing Carnival Cruise Lines after alleging a ship she was on was “going too fast.” Doris Beard says the immense speed of the vessel caused her to become sick.
According to the court document, Beard said, quote, “due to the speed of the ship I became very sick, my body swayed terrible on the ship I had bleeding, which I had not has in three years. The ship was moving so fast everyone on board became sick, even the workers.”
She filed her claim in August 2009, but the amount she’s seeking was not specified. It also wasn’t specified which ship she was on, but most of Carnival’s fleet max out at 25 to 28 miles per hour.
Carnival hasn’t commented on the case, except to request that the suit be filed in the state of Florida, where the company is based, instead of Indiana. They also say the woman’s claim wasn’t filed within the one-year statute of limitations specified in the cruise contract.
This woman thinks she suffered? Maybe she needs to watch Speed 2: Cruise Control. THOSE people suffered. Not the cruise passengers. The people who went to see the movie.
Crestwood, MISSOURI - The Starbucks coffee shop here should have known it was inviting trouble by placing a tip jar on an open counter, according to a wrongful-death lawsuit filed by the estate of a customer who died defending it.
The suit, filed Monday in St. Louis County Circuit Court, seeks unspecified damages from the Starbucks Corp. on behalf of the estate of Roger Kreutz and his father, Edward Kreutz Sr.
Roger Kreutz, 54, of Crestwood, was a customer at the Starbucks, 9590 Watson Road, on March 3, 2008, when he saw a teenager snatch the jar. Kreutz gave chase on foot.
Rushing to escape, Aaron Poisson, then 19, struggled with his pursuer over a car door and backed his Ford out of a parking space, knocking Kreutz to the pavement. He died two days later of head injuries.
Poisson, of Cumming, Ga., drove off and was captured later in St. Louis. He eventually pleaded guilty of involuntary manslaughter and was sentenced to one year in jail.
The tip jar contained less than $5.
Poisson was a reluctant attendee at an unusual reunion at the store last year, in which two of Kreutz's brothers and other relatives rewarded Poisson with forgiveness, saying they knew he intended no harm. They hugged and cried together and planted a memorial tree.
Poisson was not named in the suit.
It alleges that Starbucks "did not employ security to prevent the perpetration of such crimes" and that it "invited the act of perpetration of said crime" by having a tip jar.
As a "direct and proximate" result of this, Kreutz was killed after he was hit by the car, the filing claims.
It says Starbucks had a duty to "exercise reasonable care" to protect Kreutz or give him adequate warning against harm.
An NBA referee has called a technical foul against an Associated Press writer.
Referee Bill Spooner has filed a lawsuit against AP writer Jon Krawczynski for posting a message on Twitter over an alleged conversation Spooner had with Minnesota Timberwolves head coach Kurt Rambis, according to the Minneapolis-St. Paul Business Journal.
The incident took place during a Jan. 24 game between the Timberwolves and the Houston Rockets.
The suit claims Rambis became upset over a called foul on one of his players. Spooner says he would look at the call at half time, while Rambis asked him how his team would get the points back.
The lawsuit claims the 22-year NBA referee didn't answer Rambis' question, but that's when the AP writer's Tweet happened.
"Ref Bill Spooner told Rambis he'd 'get it back' after a bad call. Then he made an even worse call on Rockets. That's NBA officiating folks," Krawczynski's Tweet said.
Spooner is seeking more than $75,000 in damages, saying the Tweet was a defamatory accusation of game fixing. He also wants the message to be unpublished and a retraction, according to the paper.
The Associated Press is standing by its writer.
"We believe all of the facts we reported from the game in question were accurate," Dave Tomlin, AP associate general counsel, said in a statement to the paper.
The organization has yet to receive the lawsuit that was filed Monday in Minneapolis' U.S. District Court.
The Rockets won the game 129-125.
Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:
Tokio Hotel – Final Day
Shalom and Good Evening to you all!
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