Show Prep 189

Greetings and Salutations, People: Living life like a king! I am Craig Dodge and THIS is Vertically Striped Radio. And just for the record: I hate the Baylor Bears. The Brittany Griner loving, Basketball player putting a hit out on another basketball player, RG3 worshipping Baylor Bears. At 5-5, those bums somehow managed to ruin the most promising K-State season ever. I’m still annoyed.

VSR is brought to you by the Amazon.com link on VerticallyStripedSocks.com.

Tweet of the Week:  

@juliussharpe
You can stop advertising pizza and beer during football. People who watch football know about them.

*Ducks quacks don't echo. No one knows why. – NOT TRUE

Things I liked this week:

Thanksgiving: Best Holiday of them all!

Going to a Nuggets game

An article I read from a writer named Michael Stusser from Seattle about his week of gorging on social media followed up by a week of doing EVERYTHING offline.

Today on VSR – Turkey: Just say No! Magnificent Seven things we are thankful for, and if we get to it…Million Dollar Ideas!

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

(Bring on Face) –

Is the NFC East the worst division in football now?

The whole world has agreed to just pretend like the 12-0 Ohio State Buckeyes don’t exist because several members who played there in the past sold memorabilia for tattoos?

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

BOISE, Idaho - A 22-year-old man is due in court in Idaho over the death of a patas monkey at Zoo Boise.

Michael J Watkins faces at least two charges for allegedly taking the monkey and beating it so severely that it later died.

His father, Jerry Watkins, has defended his son to the Idaho Statesman, saying he is "not a malicious monkey murderer".

He said it was a drunken prank. His son was trying to get a picture with the animals.

"I'm thinking the monkey attacked him and he just tried to defend himself," Jerry Watkins said. "I don't think he ever intended to kill it. He's just not that kind of guy."

Authorities allege the suspect entered Zoo Boise on Saturday night, took a patas monkey from its cage and beat it so severely it later died of blunt-force trauma to its head and neck.

A security guard frightened away the intruders, and then discovered the injured animal.

Michael J Watkins went to a local hospital for injuries to his upper body sometime after the incident.

Police say he was visiting Boise with friends over the weekend from his home in Fruitland, about 60 miles away.

Idaho law allows prosecutors to bring a grand theft charge against someone accused of killing livestock or other animals valued at more than $150.

NASHVILLE, Tennessee - By 2009, James Washington believed he had gotten away with a 1995 murder, but then he had a heart attack, and on his deathbed, in a fit of remorse, he confessed to a confidant. (“I have to get something off my conscience,” he told a guard in the jailhouse where he was serving time for a lesser, unrelated offense.) However, Washington miraculously recovered from the heart attack and tried to take back his confession, but prosecutors in Nashville, Tenn., were unfazed. They used it to augment the sparse evidence from 1995, and in October 2012 the now-healthier Washington was convicted of the murder and sentenced to 51 more years in prison.

NEW MILFORD, Connecticut – Michael Carrier, 45, was arrested for soliciting prostitution in New Milford, Conn., in August—not resulting from a police sting, which is usually how arrests for that crime are made. In Carrier’s case, he was disturbing other customers at a Friendly’s restaurant because, being hard of hearing, he was shouting to the prostitute the terms of their prospective business arrangement.

SYRACUSE, New York - Arthur Bundrage, 28, was arrested in Syracuse, N.Y., in October after he returned to the Alliance Bank—which he had just robbed minutes earlier—because he discovered that the employee had given him less than the $20,000 his demand note ordered. Officers arrived to find Bundrage standing by the front doors, trying to get back in.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring on the Whale - 7993020

Band name of the week:

Malicious Monkey Murder

Headline: Kung fu nuns teach cosmic energy to CERN scientists – Band name of the week: Kung Fu Nuns

Clip 80 – Flula – Turkey is not MVP

Top 7 Things I’m thankful for:

1. Thankful for my Family

2. Thankful for Beer

3. Thankful for iPhone

4. Thankful for Javale McGee

5. Thankful I’m not a Detroit Lions fan – Challenge Flag fiasco from Thanksgiving

6. Thankful I don’t have to wake up at 4:45 every morning

7. Thankful for Zoos

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Lord Huron – Ends of the Earth

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 188

Greetings and Salutations, People:

Tweet of the Week:  

Void: I was off Twitter this week.

I’d like to congratulate the Kansas City Chiefs for taking a lead for the first time this season.

Things I liked this week:

NFL Tie – 49ers and Rams

Proud of Luke for his Anti-Santa stand.

Today on VSR –

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

CINCINNATI (AP) — A judge's offer to allow an Ohio drug defendant the chance to stay out of prison if he'd give up marijuana might have just gone up in smoke.

Hamilton County Common Pleas Judge Melba Marsh says she was astonished by the response from 19-year-old Damaine Mitchell on Wednesday.

Mitchell told the judge he likes smoking weed and staying off it so he could stay out of prison would be "a challenge." He told the judge he could try to quit but made a request: Could he "at least get one more joint in?"

The judge quickly said no. She wants Mitchell back in court next week before she decides what to do with his trafficking case.

LOOMIS, Calif. (AP) — A prankster is changing the message on an electronic traffic warning sign in Northern California.

The sign is supposed to tell people that a road in the California city of Loomis will be closed for pipeline construction.

Instead, it read, "Smoke Weed Everyday" last week. It has also read, "Caution Loose Gorilla!"

Placer County Water Agency Senior Engineer Tony Firenzi told the Bee it took skill to change the message. The unknown hacker needed a keyboard and had to bypass some systems.

PHOENIX (Reuters) - An Arizona woman, in despair at the re-election of Democratic President Barack Obama, ran down her husband with the family car in suburban Phoenix on Saturday because he failed to vote in the election, police said on Monday.

Holly Solomon, 28, was arrested after running over husband Daniel Solomon following a wild chase that left him pinned underneath the vehicle.

Daniel Solomon, 36, was in critical condition at a local hospital, but is expected to survive, Gilbert police spokesman Sergeant Jesse Sanger said.

Police said Daniel Solomon told them his wife became angry over his "lack of voter participation" in last Tuesday's presidential election and believed her family would face hardship as a result of Obama winning another term.

Witnesses reported the argument broke out on Saturday morning in a parking lot and escalated. Mrs Solomon then chased her husband around the lot with the car, yelling at him as he tried to hide behind a light pole, police said. He was struck after attempting to flee to a nearby street.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring on the Whale - 7993020

Band name of the week:

Damp Drizzly November

Bomb Sniffing Mice?

Teams of highly trained mice could be used to sniff out explosives and drugs at airports.

The system is being pioneered by Israeli firm Tamar Group.

It uses specially trained mice equipped with biological sensors which detect changes in their heart rate, breathing, and other factors.

The animals are trained to react when they smell explosives or drugs and their reactions are recorded by a computer.

If the mice detect something inspectors or security officers are then alerted.

Tamar Group CEO Boaz Hayun, told the Times of Israel: "Animals' senses are far more well developed than humans', and more well developed than even the  most advanced security sensors created by man.

 Sensors will alert staff if explosives or drugs are detected

"Our system takes animals and turns them into biological sensors, using specially-trained laboratory mice and measuring their reactions to outside stimuli.

"They are placed at the entry point in a security checkpoint or installation, and when they detect something that appears suspicious, the sensor records their physical reactions and communicates it to a computer that analyzes the data and alerts security personnel."

The system is on show at a security conference in Tel Aviv.

Top 7 Useless things:

1. A white crayon

2. Toilet Carpet – Fuzzy Toilet Seat Cover

3. A Cat

4. Paperweights

5. Blockbuster Video Stores

6. 2012 Magnetic NHL Schedule

7. Segways

Rabbit Ear Antennae

The newspaper someone else leaves on the back of the toilet

Calculators

Leaf Blower

My two years of Algebra from High School

Encyclopedia

Spelling Tests

Hood Ornaments

A Panda Express coupon

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Todd Snider – Fortunate Son

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 187

Greetings and Salutations, People:

…THIS is Vertically Striped Radio.

Just googled “Does farting hurt a spacesuit?” this is the kind of research that goes into VSR.

Tweet of the Week:  

@shariv67
My home security system is just 15 motion-activated Big Mouth Billy Basses.

Things I liked this week:

-Having two days off

-The end of political commercials

-Prop 64 passed

-New Orleans Bananas

Break-up with Scar-Jo

Ellie – I hate black!

Luke – Going to the bathroom

Today on VSR – The internet has changed the world…we’ll look at how it might not be entirely a good thing and my upcoming personal challenge.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

Walton, KENTUCKY - Bobby McDonald would be preparing to take his hard-earned seat on Walton City Council had Tuesday's ballot not ended in a tie.

All he needed to defeat his nearest opponent Olivia Ballou for the sixth available place was one more vote…His wife Katie's vote, to be precise.

She called him election night with ten minutes to go before the polls closed to say she had not managed to get to the polls, and he told her not to worry.

“What harm could it do?” he reasoned.

"She works extra hours at night, goes to school and we have three kids, so I don't blame her," Mr. McDonald told the Kentucky Enquirer.

"She woke up about ten minutes before the polls closed and asked if she should run up, but I told her I didn't think one vote would matter."

His fate is now likely to be decided by the toss of a coin.

"You never think it will come down to one vote, but I'm here to tell you that it does," lamented Bobby, after ending up with 669 votes.

A man who took his ex-girlfriend's pregnancy test for a joke discovered he had testicular cancer after his positive result was flagged up online.

The man's friend had posted a comic drawing on the Reddit website showing how surprised he was at finding he was an expectant male.

But an alert reader suggested there might be another, serious reason for the reading.

"You may have testicular cancer. Get to an oncologist, tell them you took a pregnancy test and it came out positive," the person wrote.

The joker took the advice and went to his doctor, who found a small tumour on his right testicle.

His friend has since posted an update on what happened.

He said: "To be honest with everyone, I assumed it was nothing, considering a pregnancy test finding cancer seemed a bit odd.

"But I guess there is a hormone the test picks up that the tumour produces, and that is why the test said he was pregnant."

The friend added: "So both of us want to say, 'Thank you.' And, in all seriousness, if you are male, check yourself for testicular cancer regularly. If you're a girl, test yourself for breast cancer regularly."

The connection with the pregnancy test and the finding of testicular cancer is that some testicular cancers produce the same hormone - beta hCG - that is tested for in pregnancy kits.

CLEVELAND, OHIO - A woman in Ohio has been ordered to wear an 'idiot' sign after driving on a footpath to avoid a school bus picking up children.

Shena Hardin, 32, will have to stand at a junction as a warning to others, after she was repeatedly caught on camera driving dangerously.

The bus driver captured her in the act on his mobile phone and then contacted police, who lay in wait on September 11.

A judge at Cleveland Municipal Court told Hardin she would have to wear a sign saying: "Only an idiot drives on the sidewalk to avoid a school bus."

Hardin will have to complete the humiliating punishment between 7.45am and 8.45am on two days next week.

She was also ordered to pay $250 in court costs and her driver’s license was suspended for 30 days.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

How the Internet Changed the World:

January 1st, 1994 – It is estimated that there were 623 Websites

“There’s a broad feeling among technologists that technology itself is going to improve, come what may. That computing power, bandwidth, storage capacity, even our ability to pack pixels into screens, is going to keep improving.

At the same time, there is worry that humans and their institutions will not adapt as well as they might under these circumstances. We’re slow to adjust, and the technologies themselves are introducing so many new elements to life that people will potentially have a hard time adjusting to that. There’s a sense that people are marching not necessarily blindly, but certainly without full knowledge, into a future that they don’t fully know. They’re thrilled with their gadgets but they don’t know what their gadgets are doing to them.”

-Socially – make us all social morons

-Killed the distribution industry: Postal Service, Music Industry, Radio, Movies, Shopping, Encyclopedias (Google Brown)

Created jobs and new industries: eBay, Amazon, IT Industry

-Eliminated “Wondering”

-Created an even more instant society

-Made it harder and harder to erase an embarrassing past

-Memory has become less valuable, and perhaps we are forgetting how to remember things as we let our gadgets and the internet remember for us.

-Created a false sense of experiencing the world. (There is something to be said for “being there”)

-Actual analog letters arriving in the mail are now confusing.

-Made us fatter

-Content used to matter and give one power, now EVERYONE has content, so what gives one power is not owning content you have created, but rather having the ability to draw an audience to your particular content.

-Lowered the public discourse: So many people are sick of the election that is about to happen because of how uncivilized the discussion is getting…surely at least part of that is due to Americans becoming used to sharing their opinion online while having the negative reinforcement of displeasing others be severely lessened by not interacting in person. In short, the internet is making us social retards.

-Created new ways to waste money: If you had told someone ten years ago that spending twenty dollars for “Facebook Credits” was a thing that would happen…how would you even go about explaining what you were talking about?

-Killed privacy and anonymity

-Made the word Spam go from having 1 annoying meaning to 2 annoying meanings

-Made the world smaller. Before, I would never have known Australians, now I am amused or annoyed by one on a near daily basis.

-Changed how people cheat – Up to a quarter of divorces in the US are now at least partially blamed on Facebook

Simmons is out on Football – Clip 82

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Miniature Tigers – Tell it to the Volcano

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 186

Greetings and Salutations, People: Daylight savings riff

Tweet of the Week:  

@nicksturners
I swear I change my mind about this election every time I open up facebook. My high school friends are political geniuses!

Things I liked this week:

Trick or Treating with Luke

Picking up Ellie from School

NBA Season starting and the Lakers dropping their first 3 games.

Today on VSR – The internet has changed the world…we’ll look at how it might not be entirely a good thing, my upcoming personal challenge, and a Magnificent Seven list

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

Caacupe, PARAGUAY - All the players and substitutes from two football teams, 36 people in total, received red cards as a Paraguayan junior league match ended in a mass brawl.

With five minutes of the game left to play, referee Nestor Guillen sent off a player from each side, but the pair refused to leave the field and continued their fight.

In seconds, the rest of the players had joined in with some punching and aiming kung-fu kicks at their opponents.

The match officials fled to their dressing room and issued the red cards from there.

Hernan Martinez, president of the home club, Teniente Farina, said: 'The referees didn't even stay on the field. As soon as the fighting broke out they went to the dressing room.

'They ran through the tunnel to their dressing room. They weren't able to see anything that happened. But, in the report, to more or less wash their hands of the responsibility, they expelled all 36 players.'

Sixto Nunez, president of away club Libertad, said he thought the officials had shirked their duties in fleeing the pitch.

'The referee needed to take better care of the boys. He should have made sure that the two dismissed players were completely off the field,' he said.

'Instead, the officials left the field and when the players were all leaving together that's when the fighting started again.'

The players, who were all automatically suspended, are waiting to hear about further sanctions from the league's disciplinary committee.

Cleveland, OHIO - How rough is it being a Cleveland Browns fan these days? With the lack of quality on the field, they are seeking entertainment in unusual and disgusting ways.

A group of tailgating Browns fans convinced one of their own to dip his head into a bucket…a bucket they had been using as an impromptu urinal and was filled to the top with the groups urine.

The group somehow decided that someone in their group needed to stick their head in the bucket. They pooled together $450 as a reward for anyone willing to submerge themselves in the collected pee. A man named Phil either desperately needed $450 or desperately needed attention, so he removed his Ohio State t-shirt, submitted to the peer pressure, and plunged his head into a bucket of urine. Luckily the camera was on the scene so the world could see.

Despite many cries of "Don’t do it, Phil!" the louder chants of encouragement helped Phil summon the courage, and as the stream of YouTube videos show the man became $450 richer and the envy of everyone around.

The primitive appeal of a grown man's head dipped in urine is undeniable.

How many people and how long does it takes to fill a five gallon bucket with urine? What poor devil had to sit next to this man during the game? How much would you have to get paid to do the same?

Jersey City, NEW JERSEY - Jargget Washington had himself quite the crime spree a few weeks ago. First, Washington decided to take off all of his clothes and then try to carjack drivers on west side of Jersey City. At one point during his nude drug-fueled shenanigans, Washington managed to pull one driver out of his car. Fortunately for the unsuspecting motorist, he managed to fend off the assault from the suspect without sustaining serious injured in the process.

Washington was finally caught and subdued by local police. After refusing to cooperate with police, the 29-year-old was placed in a spit hood and leg irons, police said. After finally getting him into the back of the squad car, the suspect was carted off to Jersey City Medical Center for evaluation. Still high on PCP and none too pleased with his current situation, the suspect reportedly spit at police while trying desperately to chew through his medical bracelet in order to gnaw on his wrist.

After being medically and psychologically cleared by the clearly incompetent JCMC, Washington was sent back to jail. In the squad car on his way to jail, Washington, dressed in a hospital gown, emptied his bowels in the back seat of the police car. If this peculiar behavior wasn’t enough to gross out and disturb authorities, the man gnawed off his finger while sitting in his jail cell. The digit, once removed, was then chewed and swallowed by the suspect.

As a result of his unruly and self-destructive behavior, Jargget Washington was taken back to the medical clinic for further treatment. Apparently New Jersey jails aren’t equipped to handle prisoners who decide to turn their own fingers into prison food.

For the trouble he caused during his rampage, Washington is being charged with carjacking, throwing bodily fluids at law enforcement officers, and being under the influence of a controlled dangerous substance. If he doesn’t remember eating his own finger during his PCP rampage, chances are he’ll be in for quite a surprise when he sobers up.

So, to quickly wrap up this story: Naked man attempts to carjack multiple cars in Western Jersey City, get arrested and can’t stop spitting and cursing at the cops, gets taken for psychological testing WHICH HE PASSES and then promptly poops a police car and gnaws off, then chews and swallows his own finger.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

The Magnificent Seven – “Top Seven Movies We wish we could see for the first time”

7. Inside Man

6. The Princess Bride

5. Rounders

4. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead

3. American Beauty

2. Fight Club

1. Pans Labyrinth

Casablanca

The Muppet Movie

Groundhog Day

Looper

The Breakfast Club

Office Space

Hoosiers

Good Morning Vietnam

The Shawshank Redemption

The Matrix

The Usual Suspects

Stand by Me

Memento

Training Day

Back to the Future

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Bad Veins – Don’t Run

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!