Show Prep 174

Greetings and Salutations, People:

Doing a lot of shows, but nothing you’d call a career. THIS is Vertically Striped Radio. Wearing more orange clothing than any grown man reasonably should, I am your host Craig Dodge. Only hours away from heading out to Invesco Field with my boy so he can enjoy his very first Denver Broncos game experience.

Braggadocios Landon gets shut up by, “Luke is going to the Broncos game”

Tweet of the Week:  

Hadzilla
At some point Princess Peach needs to look in the mirror and ask herself what she can do to prevent getting abducted so frequently

Today on VSR – A short show as I get ready to take my son to the Broncos game tonight, but we’ve got the Top 7 1980’s arcade games on tap!

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

MIAMI (AP) -- Police are looking for two people they say stole more than 500 canaries from the home of an 87-year-old Florida man.

Police say the men entered Manuel Sanchez's home on May 27 and took the birds. The next day, they sold the birds to at least three pet shops.

The canaries are valued at $30 each, which means the thefts were worth about $15,000 in all.

Police on Wednesday asked the public for help in identifying the suspects. Authorities say images of the suspects selling the birds were captured by video surveillance cameras.

Police were able to recover about 150 birds.

SPARKS, Nev. (AP) -- Police say a man accidentally shot himself in the buttocks at a Nevada movie theater during a showing of "The Bourne Legacy."

Police in Sparks, Nev., say the 56-year-old man's injuries are not life-threatening and no others were hurt.

Authorities say the man had a permit to carry a concealed firearm. The man told officers the gun fell from his pocket Tuesday night as he was adjusting himself in the seat and that it discharged when it dropped to the floor.

Authorities say the case will be sent to the city attorney for possible charges.

NORTH LIBERTY, Iowa - A North Liberty man has been arrested for driving with a blood-alcohol content nearly eight times over the legal limit.

Police Chief Jim Warkentin said 24-year-old Justin A. Clark’s blood-alcohol content of .627 percent was the highest he’s ever heard of in his career, which spans more than two decades.

“It’s just amazing,” Warkentin said. “It’s just amazing the person was conscious to be that high. Most people don’t make it above .3, they end up passing out.”

According to a North Liberty police criminal complaint, officers were dispatched to the area of Red Barn Drive at 10:05 p.m. July 29 for reports of a driver who was all over the road, hitting curbs and the vehicle had come to rest in a yard on Stone Creek Circle.

Police said a resident flagged down an officer to point out the driver, who was revving up his motor. The officer approached the driver, identified as Clark, from the driver’s side of the car.

Clark was sitting in the driver’s seat and was unable to answer any of the officer’s questions, police said. He also was unable to get out of the vehicle, walk or perform field sobriety tests, police said.

Police said when they asked Clark where he thought he was, he said he was at home, and when they asked him what day it was, he replied, “Three, but now it is four.”

Clark submitted to a preliminary breath test, which showed he had a blood-alcohol content of .486 percent, well over the legal limit of .08 percent, to operate a vehicle in Iowa. Police transported Clark to the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics, where additional tests showed he had a blood-alcohol content of .627 percent.

When he attended the police academy, Warkentin said he was taught that someone with a blood-alcohol content of more than .4 percent is “clinically dead.” He said he had no idea what Clark could have consumed to obtain a blood-alcohol content that high.

“Who knows?,” he said. “I can’t answer that.”

Clark has been arrested and faces a single count of drunken driving.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring in the Whale:

Band name of the week:

Magical Mystery Tourists

BOO! – NBA strongly considering ads on uniforms.

Top Arcade Games of the 80s:

Super Mario Bros

Joust

Dragon’s Lair

Frogger

Kung Fu Master

Donkey Kong

Gauntlet

Elevator Action

Dig Dug

7. Ivan “Ironman” Stewart’s Super Off Road - 1989

6. Mario Bros - 1983

5. Sinistar - 1982

4. Ms Pac Man - 1982

3. Mr. Do! - 1982

2. Star Wars - 1983

1. Q*bert - 1982

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

The Way We Move – Langhorn Slim & The Law

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 173

Greetings and Salutations, People:

Tweet of the Week:  

badbanana
"Ask your doctor if you're naive enough for Placebo."

Today on VSR –

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

WASHINGTON (AP) -- A Washington musician who ordered a flat-screen TV from Amazon.com was shocked to receive a semiautomatic assault rifle instead.

Thirty-eight-year-old Seth Horvitz says he purchased the 39-inch television from a third-party seller. A box arrived from UPS on Tuesday evening, and it seemed too small to contain the TV. He says he initially thought it contained accessories.

But when he opened it, he found a Sig Sauer military-style rifle. He says he had never held a gun before he felt the trigger of the rifle.

An invoice showed that the gun was intended for delivery to a firearms dealer in Duncansville, Pa. Horvitz called police, who took the gun and are investigating how the mistaken shipment occurred. Amazon and UPS had no immediate comment.

LONDON (AP) -- Note to self: A microwave is for leftovers, not your boxers.

British firefighters say they saved an apartment from destruction after its domestically challenged resident tried to dry his wet socks and underwear in a microwave oven.

The Dorset Fire and Rescue Service says firefighters rescued the man from his home and extinguished the kitchen blaze Monday.

The fire destroyed the appliance along with the two pairs of underwear and socks inside it, and caused smoke damage to the apartment in Weymouth, a town on England's southwest coast.

"The fire safety message here is to never put clothing of any kind in the microwave or an oven to attempt to dry them," the Dorset firefighters said in a statement.

SCRANTON, Pa. (AP) -- Police say a northeastern Pennsylvania man accidentally dialed 911 during a drug deal, leading to the entire conversation being recorded and his subsequent arrest.

Scranton police say they arrested 24-year-old Justin Kryzanowski on Wednesday after being contacted by dispatchers who told them a conversation about narcotics could be heard over an open line.

Investigators say they tracked down Kryzanowski at his home and found syringes filled with the opioid dependence medication Suboxone and various prescription drugs. Officers also found Kryzanowski's cellphone, which matched the one that called 911.

TURTLE CREEK, Pa. (AP) -- A Pittsburgh-area bowling fanatic has gotten a Utah company to fashion a bowling ball urn for his ashes.

Forty-eight-year-old Tony Guarino has a unique plan for the internment of his remains. His wife Stacy called Storm Products Inc. of Brigham City, Utah, when he began wondering if the bowling ball company could make a regulation bowling  ball that also happened to be an urn.

Company official Mike Stewart says Storm was "honored" by the request and has since delivered the ball.

Guarino, of Wilkins Township, is an avid bowler whose only perfect, 300 game was bowled using a Storm ball. But he can no longer bowl because his terminal prostate cancer has spread to his lower back and pelvis.

Stacy Guarino says the ball urn won't be used for bowling - it will go into her husband's bowling bag along with a ball his father used.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring in the Whale:

Band name of the week:

Creepy August Lizard

“I’ve had a lot of blow jobs, but nothing you’d call a career.”

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Little Talks – Of Monsters and Men

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 172

Greetings and Salutations, People:

Don’t go back to Rockville - REM

I only want to be with you – Hootie and the Blowfish

Tweet of the Week:  

peteholmez
"Check out Zach Galifinapkins over here!" - joke I have prepared if I ever see a bearded man holding a lot of napkins.

Today on VSR –

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

MONTPELIER, Vt. (AP) -- Working in a stout former bank building with windows closed and air conditioners humming, Orleans County sheriff's deputies didn't know what was happening in their parking lot until a neighbor called 911.

A man on a big farm tractor, angry about his recent arrest for resisting arrest and marijuana possession, was rolling across their vehicles - five marked cruisers, one unmarked car and a transport van.

By the time they ran outside, the tractor was down the driveway and out onto the road.

With their vehicles crushed, "We had nothing to pursue him with," said Chief Deputy Philip Brooks.

Thursday afternoon's incident ended when city police in Newport, the county seat of the northern Vermont county, caught up with Roger Pion, 34, a short distance away.

No one was injured. At least two deputies had gone inside a few moments before after washing their vehicles, officials said.

"Nobody was hurt. That's the thing everybody's got to cherish," said Sheriff Kirk Martin.

Martin estimated damage to the vehicles at more than $300,000. Not only were their roofs and hoods caved in, "the radios are ruined, the radar detectors, the cages in the cars ... We're going to have to get the jaws of life up here to pry the trunks open and see about the rifles and shotguns," Martin said.

Brooks said the vehicles destroyed constituted more than half the fleet of sheriff's cruisers in the rural county on the Canadian border. Others were out on patrol at the time of the incident.

WEST MILFORD, N.J. (AP) -- Summer vacation has been anything but routine for a New York City social studies teacher who lives in northern New Jersey.

James Geist has spotted pythons twice within days in his West Milford yard.

Geist was reading on his deck when he thought he saw a branch move on July 23. He soon realized it was a snake.

Police arrived with two snake handlers who told Geist the branch was a 15-foot albino python.

Geist tells The Record newspaper the snake was huge, thick and docile.

Four days later, Geist saw another snake. This time it was a 10-foot python.

Animal control believes the tropical snakes were released by someone who had moved from the neighborhood.

COLLIER COUNTY, Florida – Collier County Florida is adding insult to Wallace Weatherholt’s injury. A Florida airboat captain whose hand was bitten off by an alligator is now hilariously facing charges for feeding an alligator.

Collier County Jail records show that Wallace Weatherholt, Age 63, has been charged with unlawfully feeding the alligator and has posted a $1,000 bond.

  

Weatherholt was attacked and lost his hand on June 12 as he was giving an Indiana family a tour.

To be fair to the county, Weatherholt was trying to feed the gator fish, not his hand. The family said Weatherholt hung a fish over the side of a boat and had his hand at the water's surface when the nine-foot long animal attacked.

Wildlife officers tracked down and killed the alligator.

Weatherholt's hand was found too, but it could not be reattached.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Seven Reasons to Postpone Wayne’s World on the He-Man Movie Watchers Club:

7. Rockies Game – Saturday night

6. Colorado Dragon Boat Festival

5. Jogging

4. Dentist

3. Olympics

2. Kevin Fitzgerald – Emergency Vets – Standup AND Dave and Busters

1. Mini Golf on Friday Night

-Psycho Hose Beast

-Mirthmobile

-Scooby Doo Ending

-A Sphincter says what

-Schwing!

-It will be mine, oh yes, it will be mine.

-Showing a lanyard to EVERYONE

-Spew into this

-That’s WAY longer than a normal car

-Bohemian Rhapsody

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 171

Greetings and Salutations, People: Still reeling from the revelation that there are BLUE fruit loops. THIS is Vertically Striped Radio. I’m your host Craig Dodge, and I was just watching Olympic women’s volleyball. There is a volleyball player on the American team named Destiny Hooker. Parents can be cruel.

Tweet of the Week:  

badbanana
"Our new model works 40 percent of the time. Best one, yet. Congratulations, everyone." - CEO of automatic paper towel dispenser company

Today on VSR – A magnificent seven list to assist anyone looking for a good name for their intramural sports team, I’m very disappointed in the NBA, and we’ll try to determine the weirdest Olympic sport.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

JAKARTA, Indonesia (AP) -- Indonesian zookeepers have an unusual problem. They’re trying to figure out how to get their orangutan to stop smoking. They have just moved an orangutan out of visitors' sight hoping that the move will her her stop smoking. She has a habit of picking up and smoking lit cigarettes people regularly throw into her cage.

The Orangutan Tori and her male companion, Didik, were moved Wednesday to a small island within the zoo to help curb her bad habit.

The 15-year-old Tori has been smoking for a decade. She mimics humans by holding cigarettes casually between her fingers while visitors watch and photograph her puffing away and flicking ashes on the ground.

Hendarto said recent medical tests show the four primates are in good condition. The two other orangutans will be moved later to another island.

LOVELAND, Colo. (AP) – Remember three years ago when the Balloon Boy’s ship flew across the Colorado skies? Well, Pieces of the now infamous flying saucer that starred in Colorado's balloon boy hoax are now available as trading cards.

Michael Fruitman, the current owner of the balloon, has struck a deal with New York-based sports card company Topps to use a segment of the Mylar saucer for individual trading cards.

The cards are included in the recently released 2012 Topps Baseball Allen & Ginter Relics Set.

The silver, UFO-like helium balloon gripped the country's attention in 2009 when Richard and Mayumi Heene (HEE'-nee) said their 6-year-old son had floated away in it. The parents were charged when it was discovered the boy was never onboard, and they were ordered to pay $36,000 in restitution.

The Heenes lived in Fort Collins at the time but have since moved to Florida.

Fruitman acquired the balloon at auction, paying $2,502 for the privilege of owning it.

WENTWORTH, N.C. (AP) -- A man who'd just been released from jail in northern North Carolina was arrested again for refusing to leave the jail after authorities wouldn't give him a ride to a motel.

37-year-old Rodney Dwayne Valentine was charged with trespassing after he refused to leave jail upon his release.

Valentine was released from the Rockingham County jail Saturday morning after being behind bars since May 22. The sheriff's office says he asked them to drive him to a local motel and they refused. He threw a tantrum and refused to leave the jail. Deputies decided to charge Valentine with second-degree trespassing when he had still refused to leave the jail by Saturday afternoon.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring in the Whale:

Band name of the week:

Mr. Mustard

BOO! – NBA strongly considering ads on uniforms.

Magnificent Seven – Top 7 Intramural Sports Team names from Monty Python and the Holy Grail

-Farcical Aquatic Ceremony

-I’m invincible!

-Sons of a Silly Person

-Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?

-One, two, Five

-I didn’t know you were called Dennis

-Strange women lyin’ in ponds distributing swords

-Capital of Assyria

-Roger the Shrubber

-Huge tracts of land

-Consult the Book of Armaments

-Build a bridge out of her!

-The cartoon peril was no more

7. Airspeed Velocity of an Unlaiden Swallow

6. There are some who call me Tim

5. Your Father Smelt of Elderberries

4. Let’s not bicker and argue over who killed who

3. Look at the Bones!

2. Run Away!

1. Bring out yer dead

Olympics:

Opening Ceremony:

Most ridiculous Olympic sport?

Trampoline

Ping Pong

Sailing

Shooting

Synchronized Swimming

Croquet

Polo

Plunge for Distance

Motor Boating

Tug-of-War

Biathalon – Skiing and Shooting (Winter)

Curling

Modern Pentathalon -  pistol shooting, fencing, 200 m freestyle swimming, show jumping, and a 3 km cross-country run.

Dressage – Equestian event often referred to as “Horse Ballet” – 70 Year Old Japanese man competing in London.

Rythmic Gymnastics – Hoops, batons, and ribbons shouldn’t be involved in sport

200 Meter Obstacle Swimming Race - This unusual swimming event seems very complex but a lot of fun. A combination of a swimming event and an obstacle race, the competitors had to climb over a pole, then scramble over a row of boats, and then swim under another row of boats. All this was done in the to swim in the River Seine, so they competitors also had to contend with the current. This event was only ever held in 1900, but it would be an crowd favorite if it was ever to return.

Live Pigeon Shooting - Live Pigeon Shooting was held only once in Olympic history, in 1900. The object of this event was to shoot and kill as many birds as possible. This was the first and only time in Olympic history when animals were killed on purpose. The birds were released in front of a participant and the winner was the competitor who shot down the most birds from the sky. The participant was eliminated once they missed two birds. Nearly 300 birds were killed. The event turned out to be quite messy in the end with dead or injured birds on the ground and blood and feathers all over the place. An award of 20,000 Francs was the prize for the winner, though the top four finishers agreed to split the winnings.

In the 1900 Olympics in Paris, Frederick Lane of Australia won the 200 meter freestyle event. Instead of a gold medal, he was given a 50-pound bronze horse.

Craig’s List – (Clip 10)

The Longest Password
During a recent password audit by Google, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento" When asked why she had such a long password, she rolled her eyes and said: "Hello! It has to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital."

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

The Lumineers – Stubborn Love (Clip 91)

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!