Show Prep 122

Greetings and Salutations, People: Despite all appearances to the contrary, this is the show that is still NOT supporting the WNBA…This is Vertically Striped Radio. Right at the top, I want to put in my entry in for the Adam Rank Gridiron Podcast theme song. (Clip 37)

Tweet of the Week:

jordanrubin Jordan Rubin 

Abe Lincoln is dead to me.

Today on VSR – A rough week for Craig, Jay Glazer hates clowns, The Miami Hurricanes football program is going up in smoke, a new edition of something to think about, my tickets just came in the mail, and the He-Man movie watchers club finally gets around to discussing Rubber…a movie about a sentient tire that uses its powers to kill. No, really, that’s what it is about.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-6831 OR 6-HOP-1-MOVE-1

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

SAO PAULO – Every Friday night for 23 years, Zeli Rossi has traded his bed in Brazil's southeastern state of Minas Gerais for a coffin.

Rossi’s  sleeping habit became public last month when his 14-year-old grandson wrote a story about him for his school's newspaper.

Rossi says he sleeps in the coffin to honor a deceased friend.

Long ago, the two promised each other that whoever died first would have his casket bought by the other. Rossi's friend bought him a coffin when he mistakenly thought Rossi had died in a 1983 car crash.

When the friend died in 1988, Rossi started sleeping in the coffin to honor his memory.

And he also kept his promise to buy the dead friend a "brand new" casket.

FARIBAULT, Minn. – An 11-year-old Minnesota boy has made an astounding hockey shot — sending a puck into a tiny hole 89 feet away.

The shot at a charity game should be worth $50,000, but there's one problem: Nate Smith was standing in for his identical twin, Nick.

Nick Smith says he was outside when his ticket was drawn to make the shot Thursday at the charity game in the southern Minnesota city of Faribault (FAIR'-boh). So, his brother stepped in.

Nate Smith says he was "stunned" when the puck went in.

Their father, Pat Smith, told organizers Nate, not Nick, made the shot. He says honesty is the best policy.

The company that insured the raffle hasn't said yet if it will pay.

 

ROME – Undercover police have donned togas, capes and sandals to stop a turf battle among Italians who impersonate gladiators outside the Coliseum and other landmarks in Rome and make money by posing for camera carrying tourists.

The trade has been tolerated for years, but that was before about 20 of the practitioners began assaulting and intimidating their competitors to take over lucrative tourist spots such as the Coliseum, the Forum and the Vatican, officials and police said Friday.

So police decided to intervene disguised as gladiators, garbage collectors and tourists, but their operation at the ancient arena and the nearby Piazza Venezia wasn't easy.

On Wednesday, police impersonating gladiators were attacked when they told competitors to leave the scene, but police dressed as garbage collectors and tourists came to their rescue.

One suspect demanded the money a woman tourist had paid for a photo of herself with a gladiator, but it turned out the pair in the photograph were both undercover officers.

Italian media carried photos or TV footage showing a handcuffed gladiator being taken away and a policeman pretending to be a tourist wrapping an arm around a gladiator's neck.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

New Segment:

How old is _____???

Willie Nelson? (78)

Anti-Commercial – Clip 38

Rough week for me:

WNBA Avatar?? Low blow (yet well done.)

Even lower, StreetDreamer83 creating a picture of me wearing a Raiders hat.

And the worst…The Message Board was out for a full day this week.

Sports Authority Field at Mile High

Why I love the Dan Lebatard Show – Jay Glazer hates clowns (Clips 33 and 34)

Why does the world hate Cousin Brandon?

What is going on with Miami Football?

Ikea – Can someone explain the passion??

The Hunger Games: Good book series, especially the first book.

Something to think about:

1.    White is a weird favorite color

2.    Snickers Peanut Butter – Really good

3.    Whispering is really annoying

4.    No one wants to drink from a yellow tumbler.

5.    Biggest waste of time ever? Man named Jon counts to 100,000 on YouTube. It took him 78 hours. He missed 999,991. He also fired off 5 Confetti Poppers once he was done, then he turned off the camera. Why would someone do such a thing? (Not all in one take, it took 77 hours total, and he spread it out over 3 months.)

6.    Has anyone ever gotten violently angry when a waiter asked, “Is Coke Okay?”

7.    Porcupine Sex – The most careful thing in the world.

John Lajoie – Everyday Normal Guy (Clip 35)

Week in Wankery

Yellow: Auto Paper Towels, Those weird halogen headlights, Ball Mice

Green: Happy Meal Boxes

Red: My Cell Phone

Non-Gender Preschool:

http://beta.news.yahoo.com/no-him-her-preschool-fights-gender-bias-122541829.html

Genderfy it – Assigning a gender to inanimate objects

Table

Tire

Chair

Dishwasher

Car

Cell Phone

Wrench

Microwave

He-Man Movie Watcher’s Club:

Rubber

Weird opening scene with the geeky dude waiting for the cop with all the chairs set up in the road, and the car knocks them all apart.

Tire comes to life, learns what it’s like to crush by smashing a plastic bottle, then a scorpion, then learns to use it’s telekinetic powers.

Blows up a dude’s head.

Kid who sees what it’s doing gets bossed around by what must be his dad, and also possibly the worst actor on the planet. Kid puts exploded crow parts on his pizza…”Here’s your double toppings.”

The “audience” is all poisoned to death by the turkey. The same turkey that shows up in the weird guy’s motel room.

Tire watches a tire fire and then goes on a rampage, only stopping to watch NASCAR.

Blows up the head of the crippled old guy who is “Just a spectator”

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Burlap to Cashmere: Orchestrated Love Song (From new Self Titled Album)

(Clip 93)

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 121

Greetings and Salutations, People:

Jeff and the hotel bed of pee.

Tweet of the Week:

Today on VSR – The news is strictly based in Kiev this week, as I go over the segment I tried to do on episode 120, but ran into Ed on a hot streak. Magnificent 7 list of 7 things so cutesy that I shouldn’t like them, but still do, My interview with Cousin Brandon and his lady, and a music recommendation…All on this special podcast edition of VSR.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-6831 OR 6-HOP-1-MOVE-1

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

ANTIOCH, Ill. – A boy fishing in a northern Illinois lake hooked — and then lost — what he thought was a human foot, but a search determined the appendage had belonged to a mannequin.

Divers and sonar teams spent nearly 10 hours searching Lake Marie, near Antioch, before they located the fake foot Wednesday evening.

Authorities say the boy reeled the foot to within three feet of his boat before it fell back into the murky water.

Gurnee Fire Department Battalion Chief John Skillman says the search was launched because the boy was considered a reliable source.

BEIJING – If your girlfriend's favorite color is orange and you want to propose, maybe dressing yourself and 48 friends as giant carrots is the best way to get her to say yes.

One lovestruck Chinese man did recently for China's Valentine's Day in the center of the eastern city of Qingdao.

As bemused shoppers — and his girlfriend — looked on, the man spoke into a microphone inside his costume about their first date six months ago.

He then peeled away his disguise and proposed. Shoppers shouted "marry him, marry him," and she accepted.

The reports say the proposal took him three weeks to plan and cost 100,000 yuan ($15,000).

VIENNA – A famed Austrian museum has fired an employee for washing his hands and face with his urine.

Alfred Zoppelt says he was fired after 23 years of working as an attendant at the Belvedere, a castle in Vienna with a major art collection. He says his adherence to urine therapy was previously "never a problem."

Zoppelt, 57, said Thursday his notice from Belvedere says he was fired because "you regularly rub urine into your skin, particularly the face and hands. With this, you soil your place of work ... and threaten the health of your co-workers."

A woman answering the Belvedere press department phone confirmed that Zoppelt was fired but refused to give her name or further information.

Believers in urine therapy claim medical and cosmetic benefits but these have not been proven.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Interview with Brandon and Michelle of VanityState.tumblr.com:

Intro:

Do you realize what you’ve done to me with this site??

What inspired the site?

Do either of you have a vanity plate?

Yes: What is it?

No: What would it be?

The Cars:

What would you say are the Car makes most likely to have a vanity plate?

My top 3:

BMW

Mercedes

Audi

(Model most likely: VW Bug)

The Thrill of the Hunt:

Car Wreck potential of this new hobby?

Most danger you’ve ever put yourself in getting a pic of a plate?

Have you ever turned in a direction you were not planning to go as a result of trying to get a good plate?

The Plates:

Best plate you’ve captured?

Most bizarre plate you’ve seen?

Your favorite one you’ve captured?

The one that got away: I’m assuming the Bon Jovi one, but anything else?

What is your dream plate?

Are you noticing vanity plates everywhere now? Beyond just on cars…

I see them in restaurants, decorations for stores, advertisements, it’s crazy.

The Features on the Blog:

Cinema Vanite: Excellent wordplay…it has not gone unnoticed. (This from a guy who used to write a weekly column called “Dodging the Issues” )

-I lost a little respect for you with the revelation that 90210 was one of your favorite shows, though. (Although I8A FRE is pretty awesome, I must admit.)

-Masarati with “Hunk” on it?

-The Wolf/Pulp Fiction

Bumper Stumpers:

What is Weirder in Kiev???

KIEV (AFP) – A Ukrainian zookeeper plans to spend five weeks living in an enclosure with two lions to raise funds for the zoo.

Alexander Pylyshenko, who entered the lions' enclosure on Tuesday, said he plans to spend the next 35 days painting pictures of the lions, which he will sell to raise money for new buildings.

The 40-year-old even intends to help a pregnant lioness give birth during his time with the lions, the zoo said.

"I hope that my attitude and the optimism with which I approach this project will be understood by people," he said in a statement on the zoo's website.

He told a local newspaper, Nash Gorod, that he planned to take showers and use a toilet outside the enclosure but would sleep on a wooden platform inside.

The private zoo in the town of Vasylivka in western Ukraine, around 500 kilometres from Kiev, has two lions, named Samson and Katya, living in a bare enclosure.

KIEV (Reuters) – Ukraine's Environment Minister Mykola Zlochevsky vowed on Wednesday to free all bears kept in restaurants for entertainment purposes and often forced to drink alcohol, Interfax news agency reported on Wednesday.

Captured and tamed bears were often used for entertainment in the Russian Empire, which included Ukraine, turning the animal into a national symbol.

The practice appears to have also survived Ukraine's emergence from Soviet rule, but Zlochevsky said it was inhumane and unacceptable today.

"On television, they keep showing bears suffering in restaurants and roadside hotels," Interfax quoted him as saying. "How long can we tolerate animal torture in restaurants where drunken guests make bears drink vodka for laughs?"

Zlochevsky said his ministry was building a large enclosure in a wildlife sanctuary where it would place about 80 bears it planned to liberate.

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

(Clip 98 – Info Outro)

Show Prep 120

Greetings and Salutations, People: Vertically Striped Radio, where we know the difference between gold and yellow.

Tweet of the Week:

sethmeyers21 Seth Meyers 

Moody's just downgraded US to "Beyond Thunderdome."

Today on VSR – It’s all about psychotic telekinetic tires on the big show, today. As the He-Man Movie Watchers break down the movie “Rubber”. Yes, in case you’re wondering, it really is a full-length movie about a killer tire. And in the spirit of an inanimate object becoming a homicidal killer, We’re ticketing inanimate wankers in the Week in Wankery, because things can be wankers too. We’ll take a look and try to decide the weirdest thing going down in Kiev. It’s a full day on Vertically Striped Radio, so here we go.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-6831 OR 6-HOP-1-MOVE-1

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

TAIPEI (AFP) – A Taiwanese court has ordered a runaway bride to pay Tw$250,000 ($8,620) in emotional damage to her groom-to-have-been for not showing up at their wedding, local media reported Friday.

The woman, who was five-months pregnant at the time, failed to show up at the wedding ceremony in November after she and her intended had fought over the number of guests to be invited.

The deeply embarrassed groom decided on a whim to ask the maid of honour to stand in the bride's place to fake a wedding, but ended up falling in love with the understudy and later married her for real.

The groom, who lives in southern Kaohsiung city, was also victorious in court after he was awarded Tw$250,000 in a final verdict, although he had sought Tw$1 million in compensation.

The runaway bride gave birth to their baby earlier this year, which she is raising alone.

CHICAGO – A pregnant suburban Chicago woman was so determined to finish the Illinois bar exam that she completed the test even after going into labor.

The Chicago Tribune reports 29-year-old Elana Nightingale Dawson had started the final portion of the exam last week when the Northwestern Law School graduate went into labor. The exam must be finished to be valid.

Nightingale Dawson says her goal was "to get through the exam as fast as I could and leave" unless anything more serious happened. Her contractions were about 15 minutes apart.

After finishing, she walked with the proctor about one block to a downtown Chicago hospital. The Downers Grove woman's son, Wilson, was delivered by C-section about two hours later.

She'll find out in October if she passed the bar.

IDAHO FALLS, Idaho (Reuters) – Police in Idaho Falls have told a man to stop wearing a bunny suit in public after people complained he has been frightening children.

Residents in the northwestern city of 54,000 people reported William Falkingham, 34, occasionally wears a tutu with the bunny suit, police said in a statement on Tuesday.

Police warned Falkingham after a woman said she saw him dressed in the costume, peeking at her young son from behind a tree and pointing his finger like a gun.

While a police report said other residents were "greatly disturbed" by his activities, one neighbor defended Falkingham as eccentric but otherwise harmless.

"He's got the bunny outfit, a cowboy suit and a ballerina dress but you don't see him except where he's tripping through his backyard," Deborah Colson told Reuters. "He's got a strange lifestyle at home but we all do weird things at home."

Falkingham told officers he "enjoys wearing the suit" but understands the concerns and that he could be cited as a public nuisance, police spokeswoman Joelyn Hansen said.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Football news:

-Plaxico Burress signs with the Jets

-Rex Ryan gets a leg tattoo

-Braylon Edwards to the 49ers

-Seahawks sign Zach Miller (already have John Carlson)

Something to think about:

1. What is the best Jolly Rancher Flavor?

2. Why do we still have to sign credit card receipts?

3. Slugs prefer Budweiser -

http://bangordailynews.com/2011/07/21/living/garden-slugs-prefer-budweiser-over-foreign-brands/

4. Mints in a Wal-Mart bathroom

5. The definition of what a song is has changed drastically over the past 100 years.

6. Why do my co-workers call me on the phone from seven feet away?

7. Special Agent Oso: They use ethnic names, but the characters all look Caucasian.

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

With thanks to my friend Johnny Y, the music recommendation this week is

Action Hero – Fountains of Wayne from the new album “Sky Full of Holes”

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

(Clip 98 – Info Outro)