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Rice Pudding
Tweet of the Week:
Really want to get drunk with the Muppets.
Today on VSR – Attention entrepreneurs, pay close attention to the show today, as you may listen your way to wealth. Take your pick of tons of great money making ideas today! We also have a reader submitted Craigslist Missed Connection that is too good to NOT share, the AFC and NFC Championship games go down tomorrow, and we’ll finally delve into a new “Something to Think About.”
If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB
Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)
Twitter: @socnorb777
(Bring on Face) –
Question: What company is the biggest toy distributor in the world?
Answer: McDonalds
Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
TOPEKA, Kan. – A judge has dismissed a lawsuit filed by a Colorado man who held a Kansas couple hostage then sued them for breach of contract for turning him in.
Jesse Dimmick of Denver contended he had a legally binding oral contract with Jared and Lindsay Rowley that they'd hide him from police in return for money.
Dimmick was a fugitive facing a murder charge when he burst into the Rowleys' home in September 2009 and confronted them at knifepoint. The Rowleys escaped when he fell asleep.
Dimmick was later convicted of kidnapping and other charges and the Rowleys sued him for more than $75,000 in damages. Dimmick counter-sued, seeking $160,000 for hospital bills and $75,000 for pain and suffering. Thankfully, the judge on the case has dismissed Dimmick’s suit.
SALZBURG, Austria – An Austrian high school principal narrowly escaped legal action after going after potential exam cheaters with a high-tech — but illegal — idea.
Gerhard Klampfer reportedly bought and mounted a jamming device strong enough to prevent graduating classes from doing Internet research on their smartphones during final exams last summer.
State broadcaster ORF said on its website Monday that the move was effective enough to arouse the attention of a phone service provider. The company alerted authorities in charge of monitoring radio traffic after noticing lack of service.
They then notified legal officials who threatened Klampfer with a misdemeanor. Under Austrian law only police, the military and others in charge of security can jam signals.
Klampfer says he didn't know he was breaking the law. He was let off with a warning, instead of a fine.
OAK PARK, Ill. – A suburban Chicago man thought the errant nail that discharged from the gun he was working with had whizzed by his head. Instead, it was lodged in his brain.
Dante Autullo was in his workshop using the nail gun Tuesday when it recoiled near his head.
He felt what he thought was the point of the gun hit his head. But what really happened was that when the gun came in contact with his head, the sensor recognized a flat surface and fired.
"I looked at it when he got home, and it just looked like his head was cut open," his fiancée Gail Glaenzer said. He thought the nail had just whizzed by his ear, and nothing indicated that wasn’t the case, so she simply cleaned the wound with peroxide.
While there are pain-sensitive nerves on a person's skull, there aren't any within the brain itself. That's why he would have felt the nail strike the skull, but he wouldn't have felt it penetrate the brain.
Neither Dante nor Gail thought much about it, and he went on with his day, even plowing a bit of snow. But the next day when he awoke from a nap nausea and a monster headache, Glaenzer sensed something was wrong and suggested they go to the hospital. At first Autullo refused, but he relented after the two picked up their son at school Wednesday evening.
A couple hours later an X-ray was taken, and there in the middle of his brain was a nail. Doctors told Autullo and Glaenzer that the nail came within millimeters from the part of the brain that controls motor function. He was rushed by ambulance to the other hospital for more specialized care.
Here is my favorite part of the story: In the ambulance on the way to the more specialized hospital, Dante posted a photo of the X-Ray to Facebook. After a successful four hour surgery, Dante has lost no movement in his limbs, he’s talking normal, he remembers everything, basically he is showing no ill effects from the experience. His fiancée calls it a miracle. As for the nail, well, Dante wants to make a necklace out of it.
I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)
Bring in the Whale:
We’ll get to the band name of the week via a new edition of Craigslist Missed Connections:
Craigslist Missed Connections: (Submitted by Mario Speedwagon)
Hello sir,
My name is Ben and at about 8pm tonight (1/17/12) you ran directly into me with your electric wheelchair in front of the Giant in Columbia Heights, DC.
Allow me to illustrate what exactly happened that was so be-fuddling and anger inducing that it would inspire me to create a "missed connection" post on Craigslist.
After a long day at work, I entered the aforementioned Giant in our wonderful nation's capital. All I needed were paper towels. I purchased said paper towels and was on my merry way home only to be caught in a pedestrian traffic jam of sorts at the entrance of the grocery store. After avoiding disaster and taking a sigh of relief, my eyes were suddenly affixed upon an middle-aged gentleman about four to five feet away from me in an electric wheelchair hellbent on taking me out. That gentleman was you, sir. Not only did you run directly into me, but I consequently fell directly onto you, and then off your wheelchair, and then onto the ground.
Now, what for lack of better words "pisses me the f*ck off" is the fact that you threw up your hands like you were just attacked by a pack of rabid penguins. What "pisses me the f*ck off" even more is the fact that all the on-lookers immediately ran to your side to see if you were "okay." Don't mind me. It's all gravy. Getting hit by people in electric wheelchairs is apparently a normally occurring thing in everyday life. Moreover, I get that you are handicapped for whatever reason and need an electric wheelchair to do whatever it is you do, but in my years of living I've gathered that by now electric wheelchairs have the ability to stop as well as go.
One more thing. I have a broken toe on my right foot. You managed to not only run over that, but my left foot as well, which now feels like it was just hit by an inconsiderate handicapped guy in an electric wheelchair in front of a Giant in Washington, DC (see what I did there?). Anyway, I am currently working as a day manager and head bartender at a bar/nightclub. This job requires me to constantly be quick on my feet and run up and down stairs daily to make sure things run smoothly. Now pardon my language sir, but how the f*ck am I going to explain to my bosses and fellow employees that I cannot perform up to expectations because I got "hit by a guy in an electric wheelchair." These kinds of things not only sound made-up, but make me look like a straight up punk b*tch, and I sir, am not a punk b*tch.
I WILL NOT ACCEPT YOUR GUFF AND DOUCHE-BAGGERY, AND CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL.
Judging by the shape of your legs (literally and figuratively), we cannot engage in a cage fight, and sadly duels to the death are no longer considered "legal." The only fair compromise is that I buy an electric wheelchair myself and we joust. If you accept these terms, I demand we meet in front of the same Giant at the date of your choosing, preferably at sunrise so I can still make it to work after I f*ck your shit up.
I do not care if I miss rent next month, or my cell phone gets cut off. I will use all the money I make to make this happen in order to make things right in this already sad world. The gauntlet has been thrown.
Consider your couch f*cked,
Ben
P.S. - I hate you.
Band name of the week:
Electric Wheelchair Duel
NBA
Nuggets (11-5) at Knicks (5-9)
NFL Final Four:
Ravens at Patriots
Giants at 49ers
Million Dollar Ideas! (Clip 14 - Intro)
You know those crystal light to-go packets you mix in water bottles? Yeah well the should make beer to-go packets. #milliondollaridea
I never understood why Einstein's Bros. Bagels's closes at 3 PM. Terrible. #MillionDollarIdea - 24 Hour Einsteins.
how has no one invented a battery-powered shovel where the shovel part is scolding hot? #milliondollaridea
I'm going to create a service that sits on hold for you, then forwards you the call when someone answers. #milliondollaridea
I wish crayola would team up with camel cigarette company so that smoking could be in rainbow format #milliondollaridea @Kaaay_T
A hedgeshop that also delivers pizza. Kills two birds with one stone.. Food and herbalife. #milliondollaridea
Wish they'd invent dog food that makes dogs crap golf balls so I could trade in the scooper for a 5 iron. #milliondollaridea
I'm going to start a bakery where people can get cakes that say things like "Happy Birthday Douchebag!" on them. #millionDollarIdea
#milliondollaridea A keyboard with a removable crumb tray like a toaster
I want to male a fake pregnancy test that always shows positive, so guys to play hilarious tricks on a girlfriends. #milliondollaridea
Idea for a new social network: upon creating an account, a grammar test is administered. Your/you're, etc. #MillionDollarIdea
I'm shocked that not one dairy farmer from Israel has thought to call his company "Cheeses Of Nazereth!" #MillionDollarIdea
U know how they have those cat eye contacts for humans? I'm gonna make human eye contacts for cats... #SuperHigh #MillionDollarIdea
Flula – Why the Miami Heat are not great. (Clip 84)
Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:
Givers – “Saw you first” Album: In Light
Shalom and Good Evening to you all!
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