Show Prep 167

Greetings and Salutations, People: The only podcast that starts late because the Zamboni broke down, THIS is Vertically Striped Radio

Tweet of the Week:  

Piecomic
Everyone criticizes the Salem Witch Trials, but we haven't had a witch attack in over 200 years. 

Today on VSR –

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

ALBUQUERQUE, New Mexico - Lori Teel said she can’t remember checking out a “Twilight” book and movie from the Portales Public Library, but she’s not likely to forget her overnight stay in jail for failing to return them.

Library records show that Lori Teel checked out “The Twilight Saga: New Moon,” a two-DVD set, and “Twilight,” a novel by Stephenie Meyer, with a due date of Oct. 5, 2010.

Teel was arrested and handcuffed at her Portales home in front of her five small children earlier this month because of $35.98 worth of library materials allegedly taken out and not returned.

The overdue library fine led to a summons for Teel to appear in Portales Municipal Court, according to the claim. A municipal court judge issued warrants for Teel’s arrest last year after she failed to appear in court, but the summons and warrants were mailed to an address at which Teel hadn’t lived since childhood, and she never received any notices, she and her attorney say.

Teel was arrested June 12 by officers investigating a disturbance, according to her attorney, Eric Dixon of Portales. Teel said officers arrived at Teal’s home that evening in response to allegations that her husband had assaulted someone.

While there, officers realized there was a warrant for her arrest.

“Honestly, it was awful,” Teel said of the arrest and her night in the Roosevelt County Detention Center. “For me, it was very awful because I have never been in trouble for anything in my life.”

Her children, ages 1 to 10, stayed in a neighbor’s home until Teel was released the following morning on $610 bond.

“My kids are still very emotional,” Teel said. “They had to stay with a complete stranger. My 3-year-old is traumatized over it. She will not leave my side.”

Teel plans to file legal action for the arrest.

Portales City Attorney Stephen Doerr dismissed charges against Lori Teel on Monday, Municipal Court records show.

MIDDLEBOROUGH, Mass. (AP) -- Several dozen people have held a profanity laced rally to protest a Massachusetts town's bylaw allowing police to hand out $20 tickets for public swearing.

Some people shouted curse words while others carried profane posters supporting free speech at Monday's rally in the rain on the Middleborough Town Hall lawn. People who support the bylaw also showed up.

The protest rally was organized by Adam Kokesh, a libertarian who podcasts online from a Virginia studio. He says police can "steal from you if they don't like what's coming out of your mouth."

But police won't be issuing any tickets until the state attorney general determines if the bylaw making public cursing a civil offense is constitutional. The bylaw was passed overwhelmingly two weeks ago at a town meeting.

PROVIDENCE, R.I. (AP) -- It may be deceitful, but it's no longer a crime in Rhode Island to go online and lie about something as innocuous as your weight or your age.

Fudge your age on a dating site? Text your spouse claiming to be someplace you're not? Email mom to say how much you absolutely love that ugly holiday sweater she sent you? In Rhode Island, you were breaking the law.

You could be facing fines of up to $500 and as much as a year in prison for lying online up until this week when state lawmakers voted this month to repeal an obscure 1989 law.

The law aimed to stop fraud, con artists and scammers, but it also outlawed the "transmission of false data" regardless of whether liars stood to profit from their deception or not.

ELLICOTT CITY, Md. (AP) -- Police in Maryland say a man has been charged with assault for using a slingshot to fire glass marbles at a speed camera van.

Authorities say Bruce Lawrence May of Ellicott City was arrested Tuesday. The 50-year-old Lawrence was also charged with destruction of property and reckless endangerment. He was released on $3,000 bond.

Howard County police say that at about 5 p.m. Tuesday, the van was near Manor Woods Elementary School when the operator heard something hit the side of the vehicle. The operator saw a minivan pass and saw the driver with a slingshot fire another projectile at the speed camera van.

Police say that May had received two speed camera violations recently.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

It gets bigger – Clip 83

He-Man Movie Watchers Club:

Tucker and Dale vs Evil:

The Sockie Award nominations announced next week.

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

TV on the Radio – DLZ (Dear Science)

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 166

Greetings and Salutations, People: Like an alligator farm in the Colorado Mountains, it doesn’t really make sense, but somehow…it works. THIS is Vertically Striped Radio.

If I ever get old, I’ll live at the grocery store.

Tweet of the Week:  

Aspersioncast
My Glee Club is just a baseball bat that I use to hit happy people over the head with.

Today on VSR – We get philosophical with something to think about, we’ve got a wonderfully stupid 911 call, We’ll have some fun with Craig’s list, and we’ll probably just jibber jabber a bit.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

A riddle: Mohammad Ali, Windows 95, and a Three-Toed Sloth – What do they ALL have in common? They all run faster than the Dameshek.com message board.

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

LIMA, Peru (AP) -- It's not easy being Superman.

It only earns about $160 a month for Avelino Chavez, who dresses up daily as the caped hero.

But oh, the adventures!

The 52-year-old Chavez can't fly but does seem to be everywhere in Lima: at political rallies and speeches, at a wedding shoot for Peru's famed opera tenor Juan Diego Florez, hawking tours and flights on behalf of a travel agency in the central Plaza de Armas.

"Hola Superman!" people shout to him.

"Hola, Superamigo!" he'll shout back.

Chavez became a superhero 15 years ago after a failed go at bullfighting and jobs as a craftsman, laboratory worker and brothel security guard.

"I lost my job but realized that I could be Superman. I went to the store and bought a blue shirt and a cousin of mine who is a seamstress sewed the cape, the boots, the belt and the red tights," he told The Associated Press.

He hasn't lacked for work since.

One political party even asked him to run for Congress a decade ago. He agreed, but didn't win the seat.

Chavez says he tries to "maintain order in the city." In 2002, he says, he recovered from a thief a purse the man had stolen from a woman.

But Superman proved the ticket to steady work.

Single and childless, Chavez lives in a rented apartment in a poor neighborhood in central Lima.

He says he doesn't have a girlfriend.

"But when I get a girlfriend I would like to make love on the moon."

MANCHESTER TOWNSHIP, N.J. (AP) -- A New Jersey woman who was struck in the face with a baseball at a Little League game is suing the young catcher who threw it.

Elizabeth Lloyd is seeking more than $150,000 in damages to cover medical costs stemming from the incident at a Manchester Little League game two years ago. She's also seeking an undefined amount for pain and suffering.

Lloyd was sitting at a picnic table near a fenced-in bullpen when she was hit with the ball. Catcher Matthew Migliaccio was 11 years old at the time and was warming up a pitcher.

The lawsuit filed April 24 alleges Migliaccio's errant throw was intentional and reckless, "assaulted and battered" Lloyd and caused "severe, painful and permanent" injuries.

A second count alleges Migliaccio's actions were negligent and careless through "engaging in inappropriate physical and/or sporting activity" near Lloyd. She continues to suffer pain and anguish, incur medical expenses and has been unable to carry out her usual duties and activities, the lawsuit says.

And Lloyd's husband, in a third count, is suing for the loss of "services, society and consortium" of his wife. They've demanded a jury trial.

Steve Barr, a spokesman for Little League, declined to comment on the litigation. He said each local league is required to have accident insurance, but that only covers personnel.

"That includes coaches, players, even concession stand workers. But it does not cover spectators," Barr said.

Matthew's father, Bob Migliaccio, said they were concerned for Lloyd when it happened. Then his son started receiving threatening and nasty letters, he said, and he started getting angry.

Migliaccio said if his son had been horsing around, he would feel differently. But Matthew was doing what his coaches told him to do, he said, and noted Little League players aren't always accurate in their throws.

"It's absurd to expect every 11-year-old to throw the ball on target," Migliaccio said. "Everyone knows you've got to watch out. You assume some risk when you go out to a field. That's just part of being at a game."

UXBRIDGE, Mass. (AP) -- A woman told police she drove her car into a sand trap on a Massachusetts golf course because her GPS sent her the wrong way.

Police say she was drunk.

Patricia Maione was held on $10,000 bail after pleading not guilty Tuesday to charges including driving with a suspended license and fourth offense drunken driving.

Authorities say the 47-year-old woman's car got stuck at the Whitinsville Golf Club in Northbridge on Monday. She told police her GPS told her to turn left, which she said led her through a corn field and onto the golf course.

Police say they found a cup filled with alcohol in her car.

There were golfers on the course at the time, but no one was hurt.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring in the Whale:

Band name of the week:

Attentive Torso

Mr. Mustard

Something to Think About:

1 - How to make people dislike you: Call an offensive charge in pickup basketball (Or if you want to confuse them, call illegal defense)

2 - You know how you can tell whether or not you have a thrilling job: Can you “Go Rogue” or not?

3 - How do you handle a very good friend who is terrible at Facebook?

4 - “Man” is a terrible last name. Because you’re always being called Mister Man.

5 - Everything “Makes History” not just Records

6 – Who is more ridiculous in 2012? The guy who wears a Mike Vick Falcons jersey or the guy who drives a Hummer?

7 - Does anyone press 5 to leave a callback number?

Rother McLennon really doesn’t like how the Grateful Deli is making is sandwich:

(Clip 50 – 911 Sandwich)

I’ll be on Bar Side Rambling this coming week.

Trick Questions:

Here’s a simple arithmetic question: A bat and ball cost a dollar and ten cents. The bat costs a dollar more than the ball. How much does the ball cost?

In a lake, there is a patch of lily pads. Every day, the patch doubles in size. If it takes 48 days for the patch to cover the entire lake, how long would it take for the patch to cover half of the lake?

Movies:

50-50

Moonrise Kingdom

Hyde Park on Hudson – Bill Murray playing Teddy Roosevelt

Craig’s List:

Jamaica has been accepted into the International Ice Hockey Federation

            -Called JOIHT – Jamaican Olympic Ice Hockey Team

            -Based out of Denver

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Barenaked Ladies – Bank Job – from 2006’s Barenaked Ladies are Me.

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 165

Greetings and Salutations, People: Direct from Colorado, a state so hot that it’s literally on fire, This is Vertically Striped Radio.

Tweet of the Week:  

aRealLiveGhost
one of the last times I got really mad was in a parking lot when a single clown got out of an enormous van

Today on VSR – Face and I go head to head in the Magnificent Seven with our Top 7 Things We Find Overrated that the Whole World seems to love, we’ve got some things to think about, a gloriously stupid 911 phone call, and an early candidate for news story of the year.

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03) 

LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Authorities say something that looks like lungs have been found on a sidewalk in south Los Angeles County.

Sheriff's Sgt. Robert Dean tells the Los Angeles Times that a citizen called Sunday evening to report organs on the sidewalk on Avalon Boulevard in an unincorporated area.

He says he doesn't know what they are but deputies turned them over to coroner's officials.

Coroner's spokesman Ed Winter says a doctor has not looked at what was found yet. He says an examination will be conducted Monday or Tuesday.

ATHENS, Ga. (AP) -- Who says toothpicks are not valuable?

Police in Georgia are trying to figure out who stole about 400,000 toothpicks worth nearly $3,000 from a manufacturer in Athens.

Police tell the Athens Banner-Herald someone took six cases from Armond's Manufacturing Company Inc. about two weeks ago, and another seven cases disappeared last weekend.

Each case contains 288 packages of 100 toothpicks.

Police say there were no signs of forced entry. The owner believes a current or former employee might be responsible.

Two employees told the owner they saw a man selling containers of Armond's toothpicks at a flea market last weekend.

Allentown, PENNSYLVANIA - A 29-year-old woman drove into a man and a boy in Allentown on Friday and then used a stun gun on the man's son when he came to help.

Yardley Joy Frantz of Allentown was trying to flee the collision at 6:55 p.m. in the 700 block of Clay Street, near N. Seventh Street, when Pedro Gonzalez Jr. confronted her and she zapped him in the chest with the stun gun, police said.

Allentown police were able to track down the woman by her personalized license plate, which read ZOMBIE.

Police were dispatched to Clay Street on a report of a hit-and-run pedestrian collision.

Pedro Gonzalez Jr. told police a car hit his father, Pedro Gonzalez Sr., and his nephew Carlos Correa, who was riding a toy car. Gonzalez Jr. confronted the driver when she tried to leave and she used the stun gun on him.

Other witnesses reported seeing the hit-and-run collision and the stun gun attack. They described the driver as a woman in pajama pants and took down her license plate.

One witness said the woman turned onto Clay Street, came to a stop and then accelerated into a crowd of people, hitting the man and boy.

Police tracked the car to Frantz's home at 604 N. Sixth St. She was bleeding next to her right eye and trying to report a domestic violence incident.

Frantz told police she didn't know who was driving her car, but Jared Billman, who was her passenger at the time of the collision, told police the truth and also told them she had a stun gun in her glove compartment.

Frantz was charged with three counts each of simple assault and harassment and one count each of aggravated assault, accidents involving death or personal injury, disorderly conduct, careless driving and failing to stop and give information or render aid.

She was also charged with three counts related to the stun gun, including using an incapacitation device. She was released after posting $20,000 bail.

Gonzales Sr. was taken to the hospital; the boy was not.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring in the Whale:

Band name of the week:

The Beatles 2 – This time it’s personal

Magnificent Seven:

Top 7 Things We Find Overrated that the Whole World seems to love

MMA

Coffee

Elvis

Watching the NFL Draft

Beyonce

Ozzie Guillen

7. Gum

6. Reality TV Shows starring Red Necks, Pawn Shops, or Lobster Fisherman

5. Chipotle Burritos

4. Chicago Style Deep Dish Pizza

3. War Movies

2. Pro Wrestling

1. The Beastie Boys

Cats are Alien Spy Recording Devices - Created to try and imitate dogs, but they do so poorly.‏

That's right, brothers and sisters, I am here on ATS to steer you to the awful truth about our feline 'friends.' They are biological transmitters working as spies for our Alien Overlords. Take these facts into account and reach your own conclusion... Beware, what you are about to read will forever change the way you see these minions of our extraterrestrial oppressors.

1. There is no documentation before Ancient Egypt that mentions the existence of Cats, and IN Ancient Egypt, they are worshipped as Gifts from The Gods.

2. Science is baffled by a cat's purr, and cannot determine how the sound is produced. (Feedback, much?)

3. If you hold a cat's ears back and describe what you see, it is a perfect match to the classic 'Grey'. Almond shaped eyes, small mouth, small nose.

Freaked out yet? How about these:

4. A cat can see exponentially better than you. Making it appear that it must be more advanced evolutionarily speaking.

5. Ever watch a cat wake from a deep sleep and run out of the room in an instant? Transmissions from the mothership coming in, and must be alone.

6. All things that come out of cats are totally unnatural. (Not of this earth.)

Still not convinced? I got a few more for the more skeptical among you:

7. Cats survive situations that any Earthbound animal would surely perish in. How can a cat fall out of a four story building backwards, and land on its feet? (Anti gravity properties)

8. If you die, your cats will eat you. Not really a link between cats and Aliens, but still pretty creepy.

9. Ever wake up and your cat was sitting on your chest, staring at you? Taking your will not to do their bidding and dreaming of the day their Alien handlers once again fit you for your yolk and chains. 

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

If I Wanted Someone - Dawes

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!

Show Prep 164

Greetings and Salutations, People:

Tweet of the Week:  

FilthyRichmond
It is fun to watch babies taste new things like ice cream, lemons, or 9-volt batteries.

Today on VSR – Belmont madness, although somewhat anti-climactic, plus ways that the world goes out of balance when VSR takes time off...

If you’d like to join in the fun - (646) 716-7522 OR OHMS-1-MRLAB

To contact VSR via email:
Email address: radio@verticallystripedsocks.com

Voice Mail – 720-CUB-1-ACE (720-282-1223)

Twitter: @socnorb777

(Bring on Face) –

Let’s get to the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

MANCHESTER, Conn. (AP) -- Manchester, Conn., police are investigating the theft of an American flag from a man in a chicken suit.

The Hartford Courant reports ( http://cour.at/ML9gUJ ) that Eric Didio was waving the flag and dancing outside a newly renovated Boston Market restaurant Wednesday as part of his job, when a man jumped from a car, grabbed the flag and took off.

A customer who witnessed the theft called police.

The newspaper reports that the dispatcher had a hard time relaying the call to officers, breaking into laughter while trying to say "chicken suit."

Nathan Atwood, the restaurant's general manager, says he stood beside the 23-year-old Didio for the rest of his shift to provide security.

No arrests have been made.

LA MESA, Calif. (AP) -- Police say they followed a trail of discarded food wrappers to track down four people accused of stealing from a Little League snack bar.

San Diego police were called late Thursday about noise at the Rolando Little League snack bar in Rolando Park. Atwood says officers followed a trail of empty cookie, chip and Cheetos packages for about two blocks to a home where more snacks were found in a car.

Atwood says officers found more Little League property, including a cash register, inside the home. He says one man, two women and a girl were arrested for investigation of burglary.

ELYRIA, Ohio (AP) -- Police in suburban Cleveland say a woman who owns a cleaning service broke into a house and washed the dishes, took out the trash, and vacuumed before leaving a handwritten bill with her name on it.

And police say it might not be the first time.

The woman, Sue Warren of Elyria (eh-LEER'-ee-uh), is in jail on a burglary charge.

Police in Westlake say Warren broke into a home last week and began tidying up, but she didn't take anything. They say she then wrote out a bill for $75 on a napkin and included her name and address.

I’m Craig, and that is the news… (Play News Music – Clip 03)

Bring in the Whale:

Band name of the week:

Good at Drawing Sharks

Nutty Things that have happened since last show:

A Nebraska Man legally changed his name to Tyrannosaurus Rex

A man in Miami ate another man’s face Zombie style.

The Spurs lost four straight games after not losing for seven straight years.

Mets had a No-Hitter

An 8 Seed in the NHL Playoffs has nearly clinched the Cup.

A man in Tulsa is trying to start a Bikini Hockey League Team

Jimmer Fredette held his Rehersal Dinner in my backyard

Man turned his dead cat into a helicopter

1. Street Life (8-1)

2. Unstoppable U (20-1)

3. Union Rags (3-1)

4. Atigun (15-1)

5. Dullahan (9-5)

6. Ravelo's Boy (30-1)

7. Five Sixteen (30-1)

8. Guyana Star Dweej (30-1)

9. Paynter (7-2)

10. Optimizer (15-1)

11. I'll Have Another - Scratched

12. My Adonis (15-1)

Vertically Striped Music Recommendation:

Some Nights – Fun.

Shalom and Good Evening to you all!